Breathe
by RedLion2
Summary: New threats emerge to threaten the turtles and their family as Raph's new relationship with Emma continues to grow. It will take everything they've got to fight off the new evil lurking in their city, and to protect those closest to them. (Leo/Meli, Donnie/April, Raph/Emma) Told from Leonardo and Raphael's Points-of-view.
1. Chapter 1

I don't own the Turtles, April, or Splinter. Meli Tompkins and Emma Ford are products of my imagination, though - no borrowing. Although, if anyone out there is an artist and wanted to put something up on Deviant, I wouldn't be opposed, so long as you let me know :-)

So here's the next story in the "Stronger" series. If you haven't read the previous three stories, this one won't make much sense, as I reference the other three. I took a different approach to Raph and Emma's relationship; I had hinted that they were hanging out together in "Loyalty," and so I just jumped into it at the start of this story. I might write a very short story about the beginning of their relationship, after I get some other writing projects out of the way. This story deals with the turtles facing a couple of different threats, and not ones they've encountered before. I hope you all enjoy it - I'm already having fun writing it. It will be told in alternating chapters from Raph and Leo's points-of-views, and will be darker than the others.

BREATHE

CHAPTER ONE: SINISTER

Raphael paused at the edge of the building, every muscle taut as he stared over the street separating him from the apartment building across the street. The lights were on in the very top apartment, and he saw the shadow of a figure move past two of the windows. A small smile curved his mouth upward, and he threw himself over the side of the building, swinging his body and catching the fire escape landing eight feet below. He let himself drop, catching each landing as he went, until he landed on silent feet on the sidewalk. Sprinting across the street, he climbed the apartment building until he reached the last landing. Taking a deep breath to calm his breathing, he rapped sharply on the window.

It took just a few seconds, and a slender hand appeared to unlatch and lift the window, and he stepped inside, making sure it was shut behind him before turning to face the person he'd come to visit. "Hey," he said, his voice a gentle rumble in his deep chest.

"Hey yourself," Emma Ford said, smiling. Her smile seemed to light up the night, and Raph couldn't stop the blush from touching his cheeks. She hugged him, and he wrapped his strong arms around her, holding her close to his plastron for several seconds longer than he normally hugged others. Emma stepped back and said, "I've got pizza warming in the oven, and that new martial arts movie you wanted to see." Her voice was low and a little husky, and it drove heat all through Raph's body.

"Sounds great," he said. He followed her into her living room and settled down on the couch, and she sat next to him, leaning into his right side. He put his arm around her, and gave her a gentle squeeze. It still seemed impossible that he was here with her, cuddled up on her couch like any normal guy, and he knew now what he'd been missing out on for so many years. They'd been seeing each other for just over a month now, after nearly a year of him checking in on her, making sure she was safe, and in that year, they'd come to discover that they were each other's soul mate. He kissed the top of her head, loving the feel of her honey blonde hair.

"Anything interesting happen today?" she asked him, tilting her head so she could look at him.

"Nah, nothing," he told her. "Beat the crap outta Mikey in that new video game he bought, though." There was a note of pride in his voice that he supposed probably shouldn't be there.

"Nice," she said. "It was pretty boring here, too."

"Work on your next book?" he asked, running his hand over her hair.

"I got the next two chapters done," she said, nodding. "Going is kind of rough right now. The characters won't do what I want them to."

He chuckled, amused at that concept. "And you can't make them behave?"

"I wish." She cuddled into him and let out a small contented sigh, and his heart jumped. He couldn't believe how much this young woman had come to mean to him over the past year, after he'd rescued her twice from men who wanted to sell her into the sex-slave trade. Even now, thinking about those two failed attempts at kidnapping her made his blood scream with rage, and he gave her another squeeze, reassuring himself that she was safe and sound.

The timer went off on the oven, and she got to her feet, shaking her head when he started to get up. "Just stay put," she said, smiling. "I got it." He watched her walk off and his blood screamed with something completely different – lust. She was just an amazing person, and she had the body to match. He got up and followed her, too worked up to sit still. She was just sliding the pizza out of the oven, and he opened up the fridge and pulled out two bottles of Coke. She glanced at him. "Thought I told you I had it," she scolded, her tone teasing.

"Yeah, well, ya know me. I don't take orders too well," he shot back over his shoulder. He set the Cokes down and turned to her. She was reaching up into one of the cupboards for paper plates, and not quite reaching her goal. Raph grinned and reached over her head, procuring the paper plates and setting them down on the counter. Emma shot him a mock glare.

"I had it," she said.

"Really?" His voice was deep with a welling chuckle.

"Yes," she insisted. She was about five-seven or so, shorter than his five-ten by just enough to make him happy. He put his arms around her and pulled her close, and she frowned at him. "I really did have it, Raphael."

"Oh, I believe ya," he murmured, and cupped her cheek with one hand. Her pretty green eyes softened, and she impulsively pressed her mouth to his, sending shock waves through him. He'd thought that as time went on, he'd get used to the kissing, but he hadn't. It was still amazing that she _wanted_ to kiss him. She sighed against his mouth and pulled back.

"Pizza," she whispered. Her stomach growled, and he suddenly frowned.

"You waited to eat with me? You've gotta be starving," he said. He touched her cheek. "I told ya you don't have to do that, Em."

"I know," she said, nodding. She put her hand on his plastron, right over his heart. "But I like waiting to eat with you. It's just growling – I'm not in pain or anything." Turning away from him, she added, "Now come on, before it gets cold."

He sighed back anything else he might've said. She was strong-willed, and could be very stubborn when she wanted to be, and he knew what she said was true: she did like eating with him, even if it meant she couldn't eat until later at night, preferably after darkness had fallen over the city. They each got a plate and a Coke, and headed back into the living room. He settled down on the couch and she put the movie in the DVD player.

"This one's good, right? Not like that boxer movie?" she asked, and he scowled.

"That boxer one _was_ good." He bit into a slice of pizza.

"That's just your opinion," she said, glancing at him with a sly smile. "I thought it was, um, not very good."

"Hey." He tried to sound offend, but ended up chuckling. The last movie had been pretty bad. "You should like this one. Plenty of action."

"I'll take your word for it." She sat next to him and started eating.

Contentment rolled through him at how normal this all was. He loved the time he got to spend with his family in the lair, but it was nice being here, with just Emma and no one to bug him about something. The movie started, and as it went along, it got darker in content, and he watched Em from the corner of his eye. She finished eating and set her plate down on the floor, then scooted closer, crowding into him as the main character got himself into some dangerous situations.

"You know, this stuff shouldn't bother you," he chided her. "You write suspense novels."

"I know, but seeing it is different," she said. He grinned and wrapped his right arm around her, holding her close to him.

"Good thing ya got me to protect ya, then," he said.

"I know. My tough ninja turtle," she whispered. His heart jumped, and he knew, without a doubt, that he would do whatever it took to make sure she was safe and happy. Leo had questioned him about Emma, about how close they were, and he'd told his older brother about hanging with her over the past year, every now and then, when he couldn't stand being in the lair, couldn't stand the depression and the tears. Leo had backed off, and hadn't said much to him about her after that. Raph sighed internally. It wasn't that he didn't want Em to meet the rest of his family, but sometimes, he just wanted something, someone, for himself. Was that such a bad thing?

His phone buzzed and on instinct he checked it, expecting a nuisance text from Mikey. _We got problems, Raph. We need you. Meet us at the Trove._ Leo's words, even in text form, were sharp and to the point. Raph tucked the phone back into his belt and eased his arm from around Emma. She sat up and turned to him, and he saw the slight flash of disappointment in her eyes.

"I gotta go," he told her, reaching to touch her cheek.

"Problems?" she asked, getting up to follow him over to the window.

"Yeah, but not sure what. Leo didn't say," he told her. He put one arm around her, and ran his hand gently over her hair. "Sorry about this, but if he's textin' me, they must need help."

"It's okay. I knew when we started seeing each other you had other priorities," she said, and when he opened his mouth to speak, she tapped his chest. "I know I'm a priority, too, Raphael. But you're part of a team that protects New York City, and if they need you, you have to go." She smiled and pressed her mouth to his, and he held her tighter, wondering just what he'd done in his life to deserve her.

He finally eased away and lifted the window up. "I'll call ya later," he told her, and moved out onto the landing. She nodded.

"Be careful," she said.

"I will." He made sure to keep his eyes on hers when he said it, because he wanted her to know he meant it. He didn't intend on getting injured tonight, or letting his family get hurt. With a wave, he climbed up to the roof. Gathering himself, he sped across it and jumped the gap, and headed toward the Trove, just six blocks or so away. His brothers and sisters were waiting for him inside Meli's apartment, and when he walked in, he felt the charge of fear in the room.

"Raph." Leo turned to him, and Raph heard the tremor in his brother's voice. "You know those two murders we were checking into?"

"Yeah." Raph's eyes went past Leo to April and Meli. They were standing close to Donnie and Mikey, and the shakes in their slender frames made him see red. Something had spooked them, and he didn't like that.

"And how the police haven't been able to establish anything about them?"

"Leo, I get it. This is about the murders." Raph pinned his eyes to his brother. "So what's goin' on? You guys all look like you saw a ghost."

"We're not so sure we didn't," Donnie said, and when Raph looked at him to laugh, he saw he wasn't kidding.

"So the murderer is a _ghost_?" Raph asked. He couldn't keep his cynicism out of his voice.

His family shifted uneasily on their feet. "Well, we saw someone get taken down, about fifteen minutes ago," Leo finally said. "We weren't fast enough to save him, and we're not sure what it was that killed him."

"What do you mean? Tell me what the hell happened," Raph ordered. He saw a flash of anger light Leo's eyes at his sharp tone, but didn't care at that moment. They'd called him away from Emma, and he wanted to know just exactly why.

"Whatever it was that killed that man, it overwhelmed him. He was clutching his throat, like he couldn't breathe, and then before we reached him, he hit the ground, dead," Leo said. He rubbed a hand over his face. "And whatever it is that killed him, we felt it go through us." He shuddered.

"What, like a ghost or something? That sounds stupid," Raph said, frowning. "What about the guy's body? There weren't any marks on it?"

"No. Nothing. It was like something just stole his breath from him," Donnie cut in. "And when whatever it was passed through us, we couldn't breathe, either."

Raph saw Meli and April both shiver at his brother's words, and he walked over to them, putting an arm around each girl and pulling them in close to his chest. "It'll be all right. We'll figure it out," he reassured them, and looked at Leo. "So what's next, Captain?"

Leo sighed. "We're not sure. I don't know how to find something that's not visible. Donnie thinks whatever it is escaped from a portal, and because it's invisible, we never saw it."

"How do you catch something invisible?" April asked, shuddering. Raph frowned. Whatever the thing was, it had really shaken his sisters, and that was unusual. They'd been with the family long enough to have seen some pretty scary things. Whatever this creature was, it seemed to have a frightening hold on them.

"We _will_ figure it out," Leo said. He crossed his arms over his plastron and looked at Raph. "I'm sorry I had to call you away from Emma."

"When do we get to meet her?" Meli asked, turning her hazel eyes up to Raph. He felt heat in his cheeks and let go of both girls, stepping away from them.

"I don't know," he finally admitted, when it seemed like the entire family was waiting for his answer. He touched his sai. "Shouldn't we be out there, lookin' for this breath-stealer?"

"We should, but we wanted you here too," Leo said, nodding. "We'll split up into two teams of three, and canvass the local area, see if we find anything unusual."

"Well, let's get on it, then." Raph headed toward the door, knowing already what the two teams would be: Leo, Meli, and himself, and the other three. It always seemed to be the way it worked out. He was worried about April though – she never spooked like this. Turning, he added, "Hey, why don't I go with Donnie and April? Mike can go with you and Meli."

Leo considered his words, and irritation flooded through Raph. If he'd been running the team tonight, there wouldn't be any hesitation. He still wasn't sure he was okay with Leo being the leader sometimes, but Leo had insisted it would help him get better, help him get past the rage he'd developed over the last year. "Okay, let's go," Leo said, nodding, and Raph stepped out into the warm June air. The others gathered around him, and Leo said, "Raph, head over to the Dragons territory. That's where both of those first two murders happened. The rest of us will head north, to where we saw that guy go down tonight. If you find out anything, let me know. We'll rendezvous back at the lair in two hours."

"Gotcha. Let's go," Raph said, and headed out to the street. They needed to cross to the other side and get up on the roofs. April was close behind him, and Donnie behind her, effectively blocking his girlfriend in between the two of them. Once they were across the street, they climbed up the ladder until they were on the roof, and they ran. April had been in kunoichi training long enough now that she could make the leaps between the buildings, as long as they were uniform. They'd already discovered a couple of places where the gaps were too wide for her; he'd caught her once, and Donnie the second time. In those places, one of them simply carried her.

The Dragons had become less of a threat, but still enough of a nuisance to warrant checking them out periodically. Raph paused on the building across from their hideout. April stopped next to him, and as she inhaled and exhaled deeply to calm her breathing, he put his hand on her shoulder. Though she and Meli were involved with two of his brothers, he sometimes felt they needed his own physical reassurances when something had them scared.

"How do we find this thing when we can't see it?" April whispered. Donnie was on her other side, and he glanced at Raph over her head.

"We'll find it, April. I promise," Donnie told her. Across the street, three Dragons exited through a side door, and Raph frowned. Something wasn't right. They were normally, as a rule, full of swagger, acting like there was nothing they couldn't take down. But these three were hunched together, almost like they were cowering as they walked around the front of the building.

"They're scared," April whispered, and the fine thread of fear in her own voice had Raph tightening his hold on her shoulder. She reached up and put her hand over his. "Do you think they've run into the creature already?"

"Could be. Those two murders happened down here," Raph said. A slight breeze kicked up, and all three of the Dragons jumped and swung their arms around, as if trying to ward off some unseen terror.

"I don't like this," Donnie said. He glanced around. "Whatever that thing is, it took down that guy tonight in less than twenty seconds." His voice was hushed, and Raph didn't like the way his brother kept glancing around, as if afraid.

"It was so fast," April murmured. She looked at Raph. "He was gasping and choking, and it was terrible." A tremble slid through her, and he reached around her, drawing her close.

"We'll stop it," he told her. "And you know we won't let it hurt ya."

She didn't respond to that, and he turned his head back to watch the Dragons. They were getting into a car, and one of them started flailing, grabbing his throat and falling to the ground. Raph was on his feet and jumping over the edge, hurling himself to the ground. There was no lost love between him and the Dragons, but a guy didn't deserve to be attacked by some weird creature and have his breath stolen, either. With a roar he charged toward the car. The man trying to get into the driver's seat was on the ground, writhing in obvious agony, and Raph reached for him. He was suddenly enveloped in what felt like an invisible blanket of some kind, and immediately he started gasping, the air in his lungs feeling like it was being sucked out. He swung his arms, trying to attack it with his sai, but the weapons sliced through the air with no affect.

Something hit him from behind, and he fell, choking, to the hard pavement. "Raphael, it's okay. Just breathe," Donnie said, his voice frantic. "Just breathe."

_I'm trying!_ Raph gasped and wheezed, trying to suck in oxygen. His lungs spasmed and he kept gasping. April was kneeling next to him, and the fear in her eyes propelled him to try harder to get it together. She was frightened enough – he didn't want to add to that fear. Finally, air worked its way back into his system, and he took long, deep breaths, his body shuddering with the effort. When he tried to talk, they both shushed him, angering him, but he couldn't talk anyway – there wasn't enough in his lungs to get the words out.

Donnie, probably after deciding Raph was okay, got up and walked around the car. "They're all dead," he said, and made his way back to them. His brown eyes were wide and Raph absolutely hated the fear in them.

"We have to get out of here," April said. She put her hand on Raph's arm. "Can you walk, bro?"

He nodded, still not sure he could talk. Whatever the creature was, it had sucked all his air in ten seconds, and he knew now why the others were so afraid of it. There hadn't been anything he could do to fight it off. April and Donnie helped him up, and he wrapped an arm around Donnie's shoulders for support. They walked across the street, and he kept breathing deep to fill his lungs again. Finally, able to speak, he whispered, "Well that sucked."

The other two said nothing, and he glanced at April. Her face was ashen beneath its smattering of freckles, and he could see the nervous flutter of her throat. That had scared her probably worse than him. He nudged her, and when she looked at him, he whispered, "I'm okay, sis."

She nodded, and he could see she wasn't able to talk, too caught up in emotion. "We need to regroup back at the lair. Whatever this is, we need to figure out how to stop it," Donnie said, his voice tight with tension. He pulled his phone off his belt. "Leo? Get back to the lair. It attacked Raph. No, he's okay, but shaky. Okay. Yeah." Donnie hung up and glanced at Raph, who met his gaze. "Leo said they found two more people dead in the street. Sounds like there's more than one of these things." His voice took on a grim note.

"I hate this," April said. "How can we stop them? You can't fight something intangible."

"We will," Donnie reassured her. "We'll figure out how to get rid of them."

They got to a manhole cover and Donnie yanked it off, a flash of pain crossing his face. Raph scowled. "I could do that," he said, his voice low and scratchy. He knew Donnie's wounds were still healing, and he wasn't supposed to be lifting anything.

"I know." Donnie pointed down. "Go ahead with April."

Raph wanted to argue, but couldn't. He wanted April in the lair, where hopefully she'd feel safe and secure. He went down the ladder first, and held his small flashlight so she could make it down without slipping. Donnie followed behind, and the three started back toward their home. The air was stale and dry; the storms from the previous two months had vanished, and New York was experiencing a drought. Even here in the subway tunnels, the air had gone dry and dusty. Once they reached the lair, he headed to his room, anxious to call Emma and tell her to stay indoors. He knew she couldn't stay inside forever, but at least for tonight, and tomorrow, he wanted her to be safe.

"Hey handsome," she answered one ring into the call. He grinned in spite of the situation. "Did you get everything worked out?"

"No," he said. "Look, Em, there's something out there, something bad. I want you to stay at home tomorrow." He hoped she didn't think he was being too overprotective. _But I have to keep her safe. I know April and Meli will be safe, because Donnie and Leo will keep them here, but I can't do that. Not yet, anyway._ Eventually, he'd have to share Emma with his family, but he wasn't ready for that yet.

"A mutant, or something?" She sounded interested, not afraid.

"Not a mutant, at least like anything we've ever seen," he said. "It's attacking people and sucking the air out of them." He couldn't help the tiny tremble that shook through him. He knew first-hand now how those poor victims had felt.

"Oh, Raph." Now there was a tinge of fear in her voice. "I can stay home tomorrow and work on my book, but you know I can't stay inside indefinitely."

"I know. We're working on figuring out what to do," he said. "I'll call ya tomorrow. Remember, if you need me, for anything, call." He let his tone get a little adamant. She needed to know he'd come to her whenever she needed him, for whatever reason.

"Okay. Try to get some sleep, too, all right? I'll talk to you tomorrow." She hung up, and he slid his phone back into his belt and left his room.

"Raph." Meli met him outside the door and hugged him, and he wrapped her up in his arms, holding her close. "Are you really okay?" she whispered, looking up at him.

"Yeah. Throat's still scratchy, but I'm okay," he said, nodding. "You guys all right?"

"We are." She nodded and stepped back. "We found two more people, but they were dead before we got there." A violent tremble went through her. "I can't even imagine what that had to feel like, bro."

"It sucked," he said. "Hurt like hell." He took hold of her hand and squeezed it. "But like I said, I'm all right now. Donnie got to me before I suffocated."

"That's what it feels like, then?" Meli asked, her hazel eyes full of sympathy.

"To be honest, Mel, it feels a lot like drowning, only the air doesn't get replaced with water. There's just nothing there," he said. He spoke softly, trying to lessen the blow he knew that dealt her. She shuddered and her eyes filled with tears. "Hey, don't," he said, and pulled her back into his arms. "I'm okay. You know me. I'm tough."

"I-I know," she said, sniffling. "I just, after Leo, and then you get attacked…" She couldn't finish her thought, and he gave her a squeeze.

"I'm not gonna disappear like he did, Mel. I promise."

She nodded against his plastron, and he gave her another squeeze, and lifted her chin so he could see her eyes. "You know we won't let this thing hurt you or April, right?"

"I know." She nodded, and said, "I'm sorry you had to go through that. I can only imagine."

And he knew she _could_ imagine. She'd almost drowned twice in the time he'd known her, and in their mad swim to the island Leo had been captive on, they'd both nearly drowned. He ran his hand over her hair, and said, "Don't dwell on it, okay? I'm here, I'm good, and I'm going to make sure we stop it." He turned her toward the others, who were talking quietly in the pit. "Come on. Battle strategy time."

She nodded and followed him over to the others, where she immediately went to Leo. Leo turned to her and touched her cheek, and wrapped his arms around her. April was sitting on the couch with Donnie and Mikey, and both were talking soothingly to her. Raph crossed his arms over his massive chest. "Okay, what's the plan? We need to stop this thing before kills anyone else."

Donnie nodded, rubbing his chin. "I still think it came from one of those portals, back when they all kept opening and shutting. The biggest problem is, how do we catch it? And how do we know which portal to send it home to?"

"Who cares, as long as we catch it," Mikey said. He was more serious than Raph had seen him in a while, and that didn't bode well.

"We'll catch it." Leo spoke in a calm voice, but fierceness underlined it. "We have to. This is something the police can't handle. It's up to us."

And watching his family, seeing the protectiveness in his brothers' eyes and the way they were closing ranks around the girls and each other, Raph knew they _would_ get to the bottom of this. Whatever sinister things were out there, they were going to break them.


	2. Phantoms

I don't own TMNT.

Here is the second chapter. As a quick note, I am going to be competing in NANOWRIMO this month (November), and writing a super hero novel. Thus, there won't be time for my fan fiction until the month is over. I will get back to both "Breathe" and "Call of the Lions" (my Voltron fan fiction) in December. Hope you enjoy this chapter, and come back in December to keep reading :-) Thanks to all who have reviewed, favorited and followed it so far.

BREATHE

CHAPTER TWO: PHANTOMS

Leo sat on his bed later that night, watching Meli as she drew a brush through her hair. He knew she was worked up over the events of the night, and wished there was some way of reassuring her that everything would be fine. But he wasn't even sure of that himself right then. How did they capture something invisible, something that could kill a person in less than twenty seconds? _And it almost had Raph._ Donnie had told him and Mikey what had happened, and the panic in Don's voice while explaining it had made the rage deep inside Leo beg for release.

"You okay, sweetie?" Meli asked, her sweet voice low and tense.

"Yeah. But you're not," he said, and reached for her. She moved into his lap and curled into him, and the warmth of her, the softness of her curves, immediately relaxed him. "You know I won't let that thing hurt you," he told her, his voice soft.

"I know. But I don't want it hurting anyone else, either," she whispered. "We have to stop it, Leo."

"And we will. But not tonight." He ran his hand gently up and down her back. "Come on. We both need sleep." He eased her onto the bed, and lay down behind her. His mask was already off, lying on the desk next to his bed, and he pulled the quilt up around them, wrapping his left arm around her and securing her close to him. He wasn't sure sleep would be forthcoming tonight, but he wanted her to at least get some. As they lay quietly in the dark, he thought about the attacks, and tried to think of how they could catch something they couldn't see.

There was a slight knock at his door, and he quickly got up, making sure not to disturb Meli. He found Mikey on the other side of the door, his youngest brother looking tired but anxious. "Mikey? What is it?" he asked, stepping out and closing the door behind him.

Mikey bit his lip and said, "I can't sleep, bro. I'm really worried about these phantoms."

"Phantoms?" Leo crossed his arms over his plastron.

"Yeah, you know. The things stealing peoples' breaths," Mikey said, nodding. His light blue eyes were full of worry and fear. "I figured we gotta call them something."

"Okay, phantoms it is." Leo was beginning to wind down, but he knew Mikey needed reassurance, and he was the best one to give it. "Come on. Let's go watch TV for a while," he added. Mikey nodded, instantly looking more at ease, and Leo followed him into the pit. Mikey turned on the TV and they both settled down on the couch.

Ten minutes later, Raph joined them, and a few minutes later, Donnie followed. They were all quiet, blindly watching the reality show Mikey had chosen, and Leo studied his brothers. Raph was sitting in one of the bean bag chairs, tense, and Leo knew his brother was thinking about Emma. _He should let her meet us, and she could stay here with us. _ But he knew Raph valued the time alone he got to spend with his girlfriend, something Leo and Donnie got less and less of it seemed. April and Meli were in the lair quite a bit, but they spent time with the whole family, not just with their boyfriends. His gaze cut to Donnie, who sat in the old armchair, his arms resting on the sides of the chair, his brown eyes riveted to the TV screen. Leo knew his younger brother wasn't really seeing the show, though – he was deep in thought, probably trying to figure out to stop the phantoms.

And Mikey was curled up on the other end of the couch, his old raggedy teddy bear clutched within his arms. Leo's gaze softened as he surreptitiously watched his baby brother from the corner of his eye. Being the youngest, Michelangelo was often made fun of and harassed by Raph and Donnie, and even by him, too, yet Mikey never seemed to mind. He usually seemed to thrive off of the teasing. And the two girls adored him. Meli had spent more time with Mikey over the last two months, which Leo knew had made Raph jealous. Raph was used to being the other turtle Meli turned to and hung out with besides himself, and it had burned him some that she'd been hanging with Mikey so much.

_Mikey's been more protective of her since they were in that swamp dimension, though. _And Raph had been spending a lot of time at Emma's too, leaving room for Mikey to hang with Meli more. Leo rubbed a hand across his eyes. It was two-thirty now, and he was getting tired. Tired enough to finally fall asleep. "I'm going to bed," he quietly announced and got up.

"We need to make a plan," Donnie said. He looked at Leo. "The sooner the better."

"I know. And we will. But we all need to sleep or we won't be much use tomorrow," Leo said. "Good night."

He headed back to his room and opened the door, stepping inside as quietly as he could. Returning to bed, he eased down onto it and pulled the quilt up over him. Meli was still sleeping, and it spoke to her extreme tiredness and his own stealth that he'd been able to get back into bed without her waking up. He wrapped his left arm over her and snuggled her in close to his chest, finally letting his eyes close and accepting the sleep he knew he needed.

The following morning he awoke to an empty bed, and for a second or two, panic hit him hard. He inhaled and exhaled deep a couple of times to center himself and got up, grabbing his mask and tying it on before leaving his room. No one was in the pit, and again, he felt panic slide through him. He headed for the kitchen, and found Donnie and Raph seated there. They looked up at him as he entered, and he stopped. "Where's everyone else?" he asked.

"They went for a walk in the tunnels," Raph said.

"Why?" Leo wasn't sure he was comfortable with them, with Meli, being out of his sight. He went to a cupboard and pulled out a box of granola bars, grabbed one, and sat down at the table with his brothers.

"The girls were edgy. Mikey thought walking might help 'em," Raph said. He rubbed a hand over his face. "So what are we gonna do about these phantoms?"

"Donnie? You come up with anything?" Leo asked.

"No, not yet." Donnie frowned. "Without being able to see them, I don't know how exactly we can set up a trap for one."

"Well…" Raph took a breath. "We can put out a decoy."

"You volunteering?" Leo asked, not liking where this idea was going. "Because I'm not risking Meli or April."

"Me either." Donnie's voice was emphatic.

"You know I wouldn't do that," Raph said, his voice hard. "And I can be the bait. I survived it once already."

Leo's chest tightened. He didn't like the thought of any of them taking a risk like that, especially when the phantoms worked so fast. It would be too easy to lose Raph, like they almost had last night. "I'm sorry, Raphael. I'm not willing to risk your life, or any of ours."

"But you'll risk those of the people we try to protect," Raph shot back. He got to his feet and slammed his chair against the table. "It's not just up to you, Leonardo." As he made to stalk from the room, Leo jumped from his chair and grabbed his arm, spinning him around. "Let go of me, damn it," he snarled.

"I'm not willing to risk _anyone's _lives, Raph," Leo growled. "And admit it – this is about Emma."

"What the hell do you mean?"

"You can't bring her here, where you know she'd be safe, because you won't introduce her to us." Leo dropped his brother's arm. "And you're worried something will happen to her, so you're willing to sacrifice yourself." Leo eyed him. "Tell me I'm wrong."

Raph huffed out a deep sigh and crossed his arms over his big chest. "Look, I'm not ready to introduce her, okay? I like having her all to myself."

"And that's fine," Leo told him. "But don't think I'm going to let you go up there and try and get those things to attack you, because I won't."

"So what do we do then, Fearless?" Raph asked. His eyes were hard behind his mask. "Because we need to stop these things. You said it yourself last night: the cops can't handle this."

"I know what I said." Leo turned away, taking a breath to calm himself. He didn't need to get so upset with his brother – he knew Raph was just concerned about New York's citizens, and his girlfriend in particular. "Donnie, isn't there some way to track them? I mean, they obviously aren't from around here," he said, turning to face his other brother.

Donnie shook his head. "Not that I've been able to come up with. If we did see one attacking someone, maybe I could spray it with something to make it visible," he mused. "But we'd have to move exceptionally fast to do that."

"We _do_ move exceptionally fast," Leo pointed out.

"Yeah, and we still couldn't save those people," Raph told him. "I'm gonna go find Mike and the girls." He moved out of the kitchen, and Donnie looked up at Leo.

"We need some kind of bait, Leo. I know you don't want it to be any of us, but…" He sighed. "We have to do something."

"I know." Leo left the kitchen, unable to think right then about purposely endangering the lives of his loved ones. He heard the others approaching the lair and went to join them. Meli was walking next to Raph, giggling at something he'd said, and he was relieved to see her smiling. Raph looked up and caught his gaze, and immediately he moved away from Meli and jumped the turnstiles. Meli frowned and turned to Leo, and he wrapped his arms around her and just held her tight.

"Leo, what's wrong? Are you and Raph fighting?" she asked, pulling back a little so she could see his face.

"Not exactly." He didn't want to talk about it, but knew they had to. "He wanted to be bait for those phantoms, and I won't let him."

Understanding lit her pretty face and she said, "He's worried about Emma being up there."

"I know he is, but until she meets us, there's nothing we can do," he told her.

"Did you guys come up with a plan?" April asked. She sounded tense, and Leo didn't like that.

"Not yet, but Donnie has something he's working on," he assured her. "We'll figure it out."

She nodded and headed toward the lab, Mikey in tow. The youngest turtle didn't show any inclination to leave the redhead by herself. Leo focused on Meli, and bent his head to brush his mouth over hers, feeling her relax more into his hold.

"You scared me this morning," he murmured. "I woke up and you were gone."

"I'm sorry." She blushed a little. "I didn't mean to." A wicked little smile crossed her lips. "I'm getting better at stealth, huh?"

He brushed some of her hair back behind her ear, a smooth and practiced move. "Yes, you are. I'm not sure how comfortable I am with that," he admitted. "I don't want you to be afraid down here, Meli."

"I'm not down here." She shivered and nodded upward. "It's up there I'm gun shy about."

He held her tighter to him, wishing he could just wrap her up and never have to let go of her. They'd been apart for so long, and during that year, he'd almost convinced himself that he could live without her, that she was better off with someone else. But since the island, when she and their siblings had come to his rescue, he'd known how foolish that line of thinking had been. She was made for him, and he couldn't see her with anyone but himself. _And I will protect her, take care of her. _Jealously, if need be. He kissed her forehead and let go of her reluctantly, and took her hand. "Come on. Let's go see if Donnie has anything yet."

"Okay." As they approached the lab, Raph barreled past them and turned the TV on. They paused as the sound of sirens filled the lair. Images of a burning building flitted across the screen, and Meli went to Raph's side. "What happened?"

"Apartment building." Raph's voice was tight. "Em just called me. This is just down the block from her."

Leo moved to stand on Raph's other side. He could feel the tension in the air surrounding his brother, and said, "You should let her meet us, Raph. Then we can bring her here." He spoke in a soft, gentle voice, because he understood Raph's reasoning for not letting her meet the rest of them.

"Those poor people," Meli murmured. "How close to Emma's apartment?"

"Close." Raph's voice indicated it was much too close for his comfort. "She said the police think it might be arson, but they aren't releasing any details."

"I hope everyone got out," Meli said.

_Just what we need, an arsonist running around the City,_ Leo thought. He exhaled softly. They really didn't need this problem on top of the phantoms already loose in New York City. They listened to the news reporter, who didn't have many details, but the images of the burning building were haunting, sending a chill through him. Raph turned away first, his eyes narrowed behind his mask. Meli started to go after him, but Leo motioned to her to stay. His brother looked like he needed some time to himself. She sidled up to him and he wrapped his arm around her, snugging her in close to him. Mikey wandered out to join them, and they watched silently as the building continued to burn in the background of the reporter.

"In other, unrelated news, ten people were found dead in the streets overnight," the reporter said. His voice was deadpan, but that didn't stop Leo and the others from immediately perking up. "Cause of death is as yet unknown." The reporter started talking about something else, and Meli reached over to turn the TV off.

"Ten people," she said, turning to Leo and Mikey. "We've got to stop these things."

"We will," Leo told her.

"Has Donnie got anything?" Meli asked Mikey.

"Not that I know of," he told her, sighing. "This really, really sucks. And yeah, I meant the pun." But there was no humor in his usually cheery voice, and Leo hated this, hated the fact that they didn't know how to catch the phantoms. Ten people was ten too many.

"I'm bringing Emma here tonight." At Raph's quiet voice, the three turned to face him.

"About time, bro," Mikey said, attempting to smile.

Raph shrugged. "I just want her safe, and with those phantom things and now a possible arsonist, she just isn't up there." He looked at Leo. "I want to bring her here after we patrol tonight."

"Why not before?" Leo asked, puzzled.

"And leave her here with Splinter?" Raph shook his head. "Not sure how either of them would feel about that."

"Good point." Leo nodded. "She'll be safe here, Raph." He tried to put as much sincerity into his voice as he could. He knew all too well how it felt to be unsure of a loved one's safety and security.

"I know." Raph turned away.

"Raph, if you want her to come earlier, I can stay home tonight," Meli said. She cast a quick look over at Leo, and he immediately nodded.

"That would be fine," he said. "That way you could bring Emma here before we go out tonight." It actually sounded like a great plan to him; if he could keep Meli off the street until they captured the phantoms, it would put him much more at ease.

Raph crossed his arms over his plastron. "I don't know about that, Mel. You have way too much dirt on me. Not sure I want you telling Em any of your stories." There was the barest trace of humor in his voice, and Meli grinned and stuck her tongue out at him.

"Maybe April should stay here tonight, too. We could really educate Emma on you," she told him.

He narrowed his eyes at her playfully. "Nah, don't think I want that."

"It might be a good idea for the girls to stay down here tonight, though," Leo said. "If we can get close to one of those phantoms and tag it with something so we can see it, we can figure out how to take it down. The girls could go with us tomorrow night then." He watched his brothers' faces to gauge their reactions.

"Yeah, I think that's a good idea," Raph said, nodding. "But," he fixed his gaze on Meli, "no stories about me. You'll scare Em off."

"If you haven't managed to do that yourself yet, I doubt the girls will be able to," Leo said, his tone dry. Raph muttered something under his breath while Mikey chuckled.

Meli stepped close to Raph and wrapped her arm around his and looked at his two brothers. "Aw, don't be mean to Raphael. He's a great guy."

Raph kissed the top of her head. "Thanks, sis."

"Gag me." Mikey turned back toward the TV and turned it on.

"Mike, no one wants to watch that," Raph told him, his voice hard. "Turn it off."

"I wasn't gonna watch that," Mikey told him.

"Six people so far have died in the apartment building fire," a reporter was saying, and Leo turned around to stare at the screen. Raph and Meli moved to stand on either side of him, and Leo saw his girlfriend shudder. He put his hand on her shoulder, giving it a reassuring squeeze. "No report yet on what started the fire, but early speculation hints at this being the work of an arsonist."

"Turn it," Raph ordered.

Mikey turned the channel and Leo patted him on the shell. "If it is an arsonist, we'll do whatever we can to stop him," he said, his voice soft.

"Why would someone do that?" Mikey asked. "Why would you want to purposely hurt so many people?"

"There are a lot of crazy people out there," Meli said, putting her arm around him. "That's why what we do is so important, trying to protect the citizens of New York." Her voice was soft, and she gave Mikey a tight squeeze.

He leaned on her and said, "I know. I just hate when people get hurt."

Raph's phone went off with the ring tone "Suicidal Blonde" by INXS, and the other three turned to stare at him. He blushed. "What? Em likes eighties music." He turned away so he could answer, and Mikey burst out laughing.

"I bet she is suicidal after spending time with Raph," he said.

"Mikey," Meli said, shaking her head. "Not nice."

"He's not nice to me, either," he retorted through a chuckle. "Sorry, couldn't resist."

Raph turned back and scowled at him, making Mikey laugh harder. Leo rolled his eyes and reached out to snag Meli's hand. "Come on," he whispered to her. She nodded and he led her to the dojo, where they slipped inside. He wrapped his arms around her. "You sure you're okay staying down here tonight?" he asked.

"It would make Raph feel better if Emma was here before it got late tonight," she told him, running a hand down his plastron. He shivered and she giggled, and he let a frown touch his face.

"Are you sure you're okay?" he asked, and his seriousness made her smile fade quickly. "I know you put up a brave front, but it's okay to be scared sometimes."

She looked down. "I've seen a lot of things since I've become your girlfriend," she whispered, and raised her eyes to his. "But these phantoms…they freak me out," she admitted. "When it went through us last night, and I couldn't breathe, it felt like I was drowning all over again." She swallowed hard. "I mean, I know it didn't last long, but it was creepy."

Leo ran a hand over her hair, smoothing it, and said, "I know, it was creepy." He paused and studied her for a few seconds. "You know I'll do my best to protect you, right? I will _always_ do my best to protect you." His voice took on a fierce undertone, and she nodded and pushed herself against him, laying her cheek on his plastron.

"I know, Leo. That's one of the many reasons I love you so much," she said, her voice soft. "Do you think we'll be able to stop them?"

"Yes. I don't know how right now, but we will. We've overcome a lot of other bad people and mutants in our lives, and these phantoms aren't going to get the best of us." His voice was again fierce and adamant, and he hugged her hard to him. She snuggled against him, and his heart leapt like it'd been shocked. He couldn't believe sometimes, even now, how much she meant to him, how much he could love one person. "I'll keep you safe," he whispered to her. She'd been hurt enough in the time he'd known her, and he wasn't going to let the phantoms get the best of him, her, or his family. _I'll keep them all safe, no matter what I have to do._


	3. Slaughter

I don't own TMNT, or their associated characters. Meli Tompkins and Emma Ford are mine, though, so please don't borrow them. Leo and Raph would be highly upset!

Now that NANOWRIMO has finished, and I have some regular writing time, I hope to keep "Breathe" updated regularly. I will be very busy over the holidays, though, so it probably won't see another update until after the New Year (maybe sooner). Thank you for everyone following the "Stronger" series, and for all the very nice reviews. I truly enjoy writing the Turtles in this version, and hope to continue on.

BREATHE

CHAPTER THREE: SLAUGHTER

Raph hugged Emma hard, careful not to hurt her, but wanting her to know how happy he was to see her. She gave him a tight squeeze and stepped back, studying him. "Are you okay?" she asked. "You don't come see me until later."

"I know." He blew out a heavy breath. "I had to make sure you were all right. And, well, I want you to come home with me." His voice had a thread of anxiety through it, and Emma took hold of his hands, her eyes never leaving his.

"Is this about the things from last night?" she asked, her voice soft.

"It is," he said, nodding, "and about the fire. I don't feel like you're safe here right now." His green eyes flickered with warmth and worry, and he hoped she wouldn't put up a fuss. She was a strong person, this girlfriend of his, as he'd discovered over the last year, but she could be strong down in the lair, where he knew she'd be safe.

Emma took a breath and slowly exhaled. "How long are we talking, Raph?"

"I don't know," he said, shrugging. "We've never dealt with anything like this before, Em. But it's driving me nuts havin' you up here, where I can't guarantee your safety." _Please don't make me beg, because as much as I'd hate it, I would._

She nodded. "Okay. Let me get some things together." She turned away, and he followed, not able to let her out of his sight. It was just five o'clock, and it wouldn't be dark for a long while yet, but he hadn't been able to wait any longer. Emma went into her bedroom, and pulled out a large duffel bag that she began packing clothes into. Raph stayed near the door, glancing at his T-phone every few seconds. He almost expected a call from Donnie saying something else terrible had happened.

"Raph, it's okay," Emma said, glancing at him. "Are you nervous about me meeting them?"

"Are _you _nervous about it?" he asked, watching as her pretty green eyes narrowed a little.

"Don't avoid the question," she said, her voice tart. "And no, I'm not. I'm sure they're absolutely wonderful, because they're _your_ family."

He sighed. "Okay, fine, yeah I'm nervous. I mean, I know I've told ya all about them, but seeing them…"

She came over to him, putting her hands on his forearms, and stretched a little to press her lips to his. "It will be just fine," she murmured. "Yes, they're turtles, but judging from what I know about you, they're probably more human than most humans I know." She smiled up at him, and he sucked in a breath at the light in her eyes. She was breath-taking. "Let me finish packing, and we can get out of here."

"Okay." He leaned against the door frame as she continued putting things in her duffel, and in five minutes, she surveyed the room and turned to him, nodding.

"I just need to grab my laptop and notebook, and I'm ready," she said.

"Great." He led the way back out into her living room, and waited while she grabbed those things. Glancing toward the window, he made a subtle hand signal, and watched as Leo climbed in through the window. "Uh, Emma," Raph said, and when she turned, he gestured toward his older brother. She immediately smiled and walked over to Leo.

"Leonardo, hello," she said, her husky voice warm. "I'm Emma Ford."

"Nice to meet you," Leo said, shaking her hand. "You can call me Leo, if you'd like."

"Thank you," she said, and grinned over at Raph. "Did you think I'd have too much to carry? You brought back-up?"

Raph smirked. "Exactly. I didn't want to chance dropping you into an alley or something."

Her eyes widened a little, and he walked over to her, pulling her into his arms. "You know I'd never do that," he murmured and kissed her forehead. "C'mon. We need to get back to the lair." He let go of her and turned her toward Leo. "You've got the duffel and computer," he told his older brother, and for a second, for one flash of irritation, he thought Leo wasn't going to do as he'd said. But the moment passed and Leo picked up the duffel and laptop bag. They were still trying this out, this co-leader thing they'd been doing, and as much as Raph knew Leo wanted control of the team again, he wasn't ready to relinquish his own leadership. Not just yet.

They climbed out the window and Raph took Emma in his arms, loving the feel of her curled up tight against his hard plastron. He went first, with Leo following, and they climbed to the rooftop and sprinted across it. It was the first time he'd done this kind of thing with Emma, and hoped she wouldn't be too scared or nervous. He gave her a squeeze as they soared over the first gap in-between the buildings, and exhilaration filled his soul as the warm June breeze tickled his face and tossed the ends of his red mask. They made the manhole cover in less than six minutes, and he gently set her down on her feet. She put a hand on his upper arm to steady herself, but she didn't seem frightened and or upset.

"You okay?" he said as Leo lifted the cover and stepped back for them to descend.

"I'm okay," she said. There was just a little flutter of anxiety in her eyes that made him frown, but he climbed down ahead of her and waited for her to reach the bottom of the ladder. When she stepped off he made sure to hug her, just for reassurance. Leo came down the ladder and nodded to Raph.

"We'd better get going. Donnie wanted to talk to us about a plan of attack for tonight," he said. His voice was low, serious, and Raph knew his brother mostly wanted to get back so he could see Meli. But he could understand that – he was bringing his own girlfriend to their home for protection purposes. They started walking down the tunnel, and Leo moved ahead of them, giving them some privacy. Raph mentally patted his brother on the back for the move.

Once they'd gotten close to the lair, Raph stopped Emma and turned her to face him. "So I know I've told ya about my brothers and father, and the girls," he said. She nodded. "But I just have to warn you again about Mikey. He's over-the-top crazy about new people, and he's gonna love you, so just be prepared. I'll hold him off as long as I can."

She smiled, and touched his arm. "I'm sure it'll be fine. I like your brothers already."

"Okay, just remember: I warned ya." He wasn't sure she really comprehended just how exuberant his youngest brother could be, but she'd see in a few short minutes. He hoped Leo would be able to hold Mikey back, at least for a few moments, so Em could get the lay of the lair. But when they reached the turnstiles, none of his family was to be seen, and he was instantly filled with nervousness and anger. Something had happened while they'd been out. He hopped over the bars and turned to help Emma, but she was already over, a grin on her face. Her grin faded though, when she took in his countenance.

"Raph? What is it?" she asked, her voice quiet.

"Don't know. C'mon." He took her hand and led her toward the lab, where he suspected the others were gathered. Leo glanced at him when they walked through the door, and Raph's chest tightened. Something _had_ happened. "What's goin' on?" he asked.

"The phantoms," Leo said. "They were here, in the lair." His voice was hard.

"Everyone okay?" Raph asked, his eyes immediately seeking out April and Meli. April was sitting in a chair with Donnie and Mikey standing defensively next to her, and Meli was wrapped in Leo's arms, her hazel eyes huge and watery. Raph cursed. Of course they weren't okay. The phantoms tried to suck your breath out of your body. Who would be okay with that?

"We're all right," Donnie said. He looked at Splinter, whose eyes were glued to Emma. Raph coughed a little self-consciously.

"Guys, this is Emma Ford, my girlfriend," he said, taking a step back to he was standing next to Em. She smiled and nodded to everyone.

"Nice to meet all of you," she said. Her voice was low and a bit unsure, and Raph put his arm around her, giving her a squeeze.

"Nice to meet you, too," Meli said. She extracted herself from Leo's arms and walked over to them, putting out her hand for Emma to shake. Raph was glad Meli had taken the first step; while he loved and adored April, he was bonded closer with Meli, and it meant a lot to him that she'd been the first to approach Emma. "We've been waiting to meet you," Meli added, casting a surreptitious glance up at Raph. He reddened.

"Yeah, well," he sputtered, not able to say anything else.

"He didn't want to share me," Emma said, smiling. "He likes having all the attention." She glanced up at him, and he reddened even more, and she laughed, and the huskiness of her voice, the sweet song of humor of in, made his heart skip. Damn, but he was in deep with this woman!

Meli giggled and hooked an arm through Emma's. "I like you already. Come on, I'll introduce you to the others." She led her over to April, Mikey, and Donnie, and Splinter moved closer to them to meet her. Raph walked over to Leo.

"So, what now? How do we keep them safe if the phantoms are coming down here?" Raph whispered, his eyes on Meli and Emma.

Leo inhaled quietly, and was silent for several seconds. "I don't know," he finally whispered back. Raph looked at him, and Leo met his gaze. There was desolation in his eyes. "For the first time, Raph, I really honestly don't know how we're going to win."

Raph squared his shoulders. "We will win," he said, his voice low. "There's no other option."

"I know." Leo sighed. "Donnie still thinks spraying them with something to make them visible will work. I guess we'll go with that first."

Raph wasn't entirely comfortable only having one plan; he'd learned over the last year of being the team leader that having at least two options was much more preferable. But in this case, dealing with such an extreme unknown as the phantoms, he was glad to even have one option. Emma glanced at him, and he winked at her, hoping to reassure her that she was safe here with his family. He knew his brothers and father would protect her just as they protected April and Meli.

Donnie walked over to them, and the graveness in his brown eyes made Raph see some red. He hated that this was happening to his family. "I have some chemicals that if we manage to spray on the phantoms, should allow us to see them at least for a few seconds." He crossed his arms over his plastron. "A few seconds isn't much, but it's the best I can probably give us."

"We'll make good on it," Leo said, nodding. "We'll stick together tonight, too – I don't feel comfortable splitting us into two teams."

"Works for me," Raph said. Both brothers looked at him, and he shrugged. "I don't want to go through that experience again. It sucked." It had been a terrible feeling, all the air being taken out of his lungs, and he wasn't about to willing go through it again. Not ever, if he could help it.

"How many spray bottles do you have?" Leo asked.

"Four. One for each of us," Donnie said. "Or two for you or me."

"Hey. I could handle two," Raph said. They all knew it probably wasn't the wisest to trust Mikey with his own bottle – one of them would end up wearing its contents.

"What are you guys talking about?" April asked, approaching them. She'd been extremely quiet all day, and Raph was worried about her. She wasn't one to scare easily. Donnie put an arm around her.

"Battle strategy," he told her, kissing her temple.

"You know everything's gonna be all right, right?" Raph asked her. He watched her closely.

She nodded, but he didn't believe her. "They were in the lair, you guys. _Our home._" She shivered as she spoke, and Donnie hugged her tighter.

"We're going to end them," Leo said. The coldness of his voice sent chills through Raph. His older brother had been put through hell over the last year or so, and he'd done things he wasn't proud of, things even now he didn't talk about. This cold side of him was left over from that year away from his family, and it still made Raph uneasy. The quiet trust they'd had between them, before Leo had given himself up to Karai, was no longer there.

"Leo." Meli came over and tucked her arm around his waist, and he kissed her forehead. "You guys okay? You all look so tense," she said.

"Just talking about tonight," he told her.

"Oh." She swallowed hard, and leaned against him. Leo wrapped both arms around her, holding her tight against his chest. He exchanged a look with Donnie and Raph, and Raph knew that his brother would be out for blood tonight, _if_ they could find the damn things. He glanced over at Emma, who was laughing at something Splinter was saying. Mikey was standing close to her, very attentive, and a surge of jealousy shot through Raph's veins. With a scowl, he left the others and walked over to Emma, slipping his arm casually about her shoulders. Mikey playfully narrowed his eyes at him and stuck out his tongue.

"Emma is a lovely young woman," Splinter told Raph, and he nodded, smiling.

"I know," he said. "She's amazing."

"Raph." Her voice held embarrassment, and he grinned. She didn't like a fuss being made over her, for any reason, and because of that, he absolutely loved to.

"What are you plans for tonight?" Splinter asked, directing Raph's attention back to the problem at hand.

"Don's got some chemicals we're gonna try and spray on the phantoms so we can see 'em," Raph said. He glanced over at his brothers and sisters, and the fear on the girls' faces made his chest hurt. They were here because they'd always been safe here, or at the very least, safer than up on the streets, but that safety had been breached. "Don't worry, Sensei, we're going to figure this out," he said, his voice low with hard conviction. There couldn't be any other way.

"The girls will be safe here with me," Splinter said, and his voice matched Raph's. Raph nodded and looked up at his father.

"I know," he said. "Come on, Em. I'll show ya my room," he said, taking her hand and leading her toward the doorway. It'd already been discussed where she would stay while with them, and Raph had been adamant about her staying in his room. Leo and Meli had backed him up, and Splinter had quickly acquiesced to the request.

"Raph." Leo out a hand to stop him. "We'll go early tonight, soon as its dusk. I want to get this done." His eyes were deep with something dark and cold, and Raph tried not to shiver. He knew how serious this situation was for them and for the city, but he didn't like how Leo seemed to be sliding back into the hatred he'd brought home with him from the island.

"Sounds like a plan," he said, and ushered Emma out of the lab and led her toward his room. Once there, he flipped on the overhead light and stood back so she could take a look around. He'd done his best to make sure it was tidy and presentable, and Meli and April had been all too glad to help with that endeavor. He waited, nervous and not quite knowing why, while she walked in and looked around.

Smiling, she turned to him. "It's neater than I thought it would be," she said, and her honesty was countered with a little chuckle. "Is it really okay that I stay in here with you?"

"It is," he said, nodding. He put his arms around her and folded her in tightly to his body, caressing the back of her shoulders. "I know this isn't the best situation, but you'll be safer here," he told her.

She snuggled in against him, and when she spoke, her breath was a light breeze on his plastron. "I know you'll take good care of me," she said. "I want you and your brothers to be careful tonight." She pulled back just enough to see his face, and her eyes were full of worry. "I know you're a ninja, and tough as nails, but you still need to be careful."

"We will be," he assured her. "We watch each other's backs." There was a rap on his doorframe and he turned his head to see Leo. "What?" he asked.

"It's time." Leo turned away, and Raph quelled the flash of anger at his brother's curt tone. Leo was just as anxious as him to find and get rid of the phantoms.

"It's okay," Emma told him. "I'm excited about getting to know your sisters and father. I'll be just fine."

And he knew she would be. She was tough, too, and capable of handling herself. She took self-defense at a local gym, and had also had training in a few basic martial arts. If their enemy were simply the Purple Dragons, or even a visible mutant, he wouldn't have been so uneasy about her staying in her apartment. But self-defense wasn't going to save her from invisible entities that struck in absolute silence and rendered their victims unconscious in seconds. For a fleeting second of insecurity, he wasn't sure _he'd_ be able to save her.

"Raph, really, sweetie, I'm okay here," she whispered, and reached to touch his cheek. "Please be careful, all of you."

"We will." He tipped her chin up a little and brought his mouth down, and was amazed yet again how it felt to kiss her, how warm and inviting her mouth was, how she fit so well in his arms. He'd never thought it possible that he'd have love like this in his life, and had thought he'd be okay with having Meli and April around. But now he knew he would do anything to keep Emma with him, keep her close by his side, keep her safe and happy. He broke the kiss a few moments later and took her hand, giving it a squeeze. "We'll be careful," he said, "I promise."

"I know you will be," she whispered, and followed him back out into the large common room. His brothers were waiting by the turnstiles, and he took her over to them, leaving her with his sisters and father. Splinter settled a gentle hand on her shoulder.

"Be safe, my sons, and return soon," he said. There was encouragement in his tone, and warning.

"We'll do our best," Leo said, and immediately left, Mikey right behind him. Donnie gave April a look that only they understood, and then he too fled the lair. Raph turned to go, and gave Emma one last look. She winked at him, and just like that, he knew she'd be all right until he got back. He vaulted the turnstiles and raced after his brothers, pushing himself hard to make up for leaving later than them. He caught them as they passed the first curve in the tunnel, and evened himself with Leo. His brother didn't so much as glance at him, and again, unease at his behavior slithered through Raph. They made the manhole that led to the Dragon's territory and Leo went up first, shoving the cover aside and climbing out. The rest followed, and Raph scanned the area. It was disconcerting, knowing that they couldn't see their enemies.

"Here." Donnie passed out the cans of spray, and when Mikey didn't get one, he pouted.

"Aw, come on, you guys! I know how important this is," he said, looking at Leo and Raph. "I know we've got to stop those things before they kill anyone else."

"Yes, which is why you're not getting a can," Leo said. There was something dark in his voice that made Mikey back down without a further word, and Donnie gave Raph a questioning look. Raph gave his head a slight shake. He wasn't ready to confront Leo yet on his demeanor, though he knew eventually he'd have to, if it continued. "Let's go," Leo ordered. "Stay close together. We don't need those things taking us out."

"Duh," Mikey muttered, and Leo shot him an angered look. Mikey immediately hung his head and dropped back next to Donnie.

"Go easy on him," Raph said. "He just wants to help."

"He can help by staying focused," Leo said. He moved out a head of the others, and Raph bit back his angry retort. Now wasn't the time for that. They moved quickly into the shadows cast by the buildings and made their way into an alley that ran the length of the building. Leo paused, and Raph held up, holding his breath. Donnie and Mikey were behind him, and he glanced back at them. They both looked scared. He tried to give them a reassuring look, but wasn't sure it worked. Leo moved forward, his katana drawn, his body hard with tension. Raph followed, not too close, but not too far away, either. He needed to be close enough to protect Leo if he needed it. They reached the end of the alley, and as Raph was about to breathe some relief, a woman screamed. Leo sprinted forward, disappearing out of sight. Raph was close behind him.

A young woman was lying on the pavement, gasping and choking. Leo sprayed the contents of the can he held into the air above her, and Raph saw a body taking shape beneath the chemicals. He drew his own can and sprayed as well, and the phantom was suddenly tangible, visible, and small. Raph snarled and dropped the can, pulling his sai and striking. The phantom let out an ear-piercing wail as he shoved a sai through its torso, and it fell to the ground, spasms wracking through its small body.

"Dude, it's little," Mikey said, drawing up to his brothers. Donnie helped the young woman to her feet, and picked her up when she swayed. He carried her over to a set of stairs leading up to an apartment, and knelt next to her as she continued to cough and choke.

Leo stood still for a second, and suddenly struck, cleaving the creature's head off. He waited half-a-heartbeat and cut the phantom in two. Sickly-looking yellow blood flowed from the cleaved body, and Mikey turned away, retching. Leo sheathed his swords and turned away. "Come on. We've got more to find," he said. His voice was cold and distant, and Raph reached out and grabbed his shoulder, spinning him around.

"What the hell, Leo? It was already wounded – you didn't have to chop it up!" Raph growled, his green eyes slits in his mask.

"Get off me," Leo snarled, jerking away. "Those things almost killed you, and they could've killed the girls and Splinter today. They don't deserve to live." He threw a glare over at Donnie. "Donnie, let's go," he ordered. "Mikey, come on."

"Look," Mikey whispered, pointing at the body. The skin was slowly disappearing, turning into wafts of yellow smoke, and soon, the whole body was gone, leaving behind the pools of yellow blood. "Gross."

"Now, guys," Leo said. "Move."

"Leo, we can't leave her here," Donnie said, nodding to the woman. "She could be hurt. We need to get her medical attention."

"We don't have time, Donnie. We already took care of the phantom attacking her," Leo said.

"I'm not leaving her." Donnie got to his feet. The woman was quiet; she was watching them, but she didn't look afraid. "I'm going to call an ambulance and wait with her."

"No." Leo shook his head. "We need to eradicate these things, Don. You want them going back into the lair and killing April?"

"Enough!" Raph bellowed. He pointed at Leo. "Donnie has a point. She's hurt, she needs help, and we're going to make sure she's okay."

Leo crossed his arms over his chest. "Since when do you care about the citizens that much, Raphael? Where's your normal bloodlust?"

"Bloodlust?" Raph shook his head. "I was never bloodthirsty, Leonardo, and you know it. I don't know what the hell is wrong with you, but we're staying here until we know she's safe." He let all the anger and fury he could muster drift through his voice. What right did Leo have to say that about him? Granted, he was usually the one hot to take down their enemies, but not at the expense of the ones they were supposed to protect.

"Mikey, let's go." Leo turned away.

"Thought we weren't splitting up," Raph said.

"And I thought you all wanted to get rid of the phantoms and protect our family," Leo shot back over his shoulder. "Michelangelo – _now_."

Mikey looked to Raph, his eyes wide and full of anxiety. Raph nodded. "Go with him, Mike – try to keep him safe," he said. "We'll catch up soon."

"Okay." Mikey ran after Leo, and Leo never looked back at them.

"Damn." Donnie finished his phone call and came over to Raph. "What is wrong with him?"

Raph sighed. "He's scared for Meli. I know he is."

"Well, you and I are scared for Emma and April, and we're not chopping up things," Donnie retorted. He glanced over at the woman, who was still silent, her eyes on the pavement. "I think she's okay, but I wanted to make sure."

"No, that was a good call," Raph said, nodding. "He's acting like he did on the island, and when we first got back. That's not good."

"Meli needs to talk to him again," Donnie said, sighing. "She's the only one he'll listen to anymore." He took out a small vial from his knapsack he carried and scooped some of the yellow blood into it, then secured within the knapsack.

"Yeah, well, he's gonna be listenin' to me too," Raph said. "Putting the phantoms down in one thing, chopping 'em up is something else." They heard the wail of sirens coming their way, and they moved to the top of the building across the street, where they could still see the woman but be out of sight. She never moved, not even when the ambulance and two cop cars rolled up. "We gotta go," Raph whispered to Donnie, who nodded. They fled across the rooftops, heading north, heading the way they'd watched Leo and Mikey go. But five minutes later, there was no sign of their brothers, and Raph pulled his phone off his belt and called Leo. When Leo didn't pick up, he tried Mikey.

"This can't be good," Donnie said, shaking his head. "Where would they have gone?"

"I don't know. Come on. We'll try a different direction." Raph led the way toward the east, toward another spot the phantoms had been attacking people. They heard another scream, another woman, and followed the noise. Leo and Mikey were there, and Leo had another one of the little creatures on the ground, writhing beneath the chemicals he'd sprayed on it. As Raph and Donnie ran to them, Leo drove both katana into the body, cutting it to pieces.

"Leonardo!" Raph admonished. Leo looked at him, and the opaque blankness in his blue eyes unsettled Raph to his very core. "You don't have to do that!"

"They need to die, Raph. All of them." Leo turned away, and Raph was disconcerted by the spray of yellow blood staining his brother's lower legs and feet. Mikey cast a look at him, and Raph saw the heartsickness in his baby brother's blue eyes. This had to end.

"Leo. You're done leading for the night," Raph said. He didn't speak loudly, but knew his words had hit his older brother when Leo froze, his shoulders stiffening with anger. "You're out-of-control, and we all know it. I'll be taking lead."

Leo slowly turned. Donnie was again on the phone with the emergency people, but he put the phone back on his belt and got to his feet, his eyes wide with fear. Mikey backed away from his oldest brother and stood just behind Raph. "I am the leader of this team, Raphael, and I _will_ continue to lead tonight," Leo said. The ice in his voice should've frozen all of them to the ground.

Raph took a step forward. "The hell you will," he growled. "This is out-of-hand, and I won't watch you slaughter anymore of these creatures."

Leo had the audacity to laugh. "Really, Raph? They're _murdering_ people, and you have the nerve to tell me I'm _slaughtering_ them?" His laughter was cut short when he drew his katana. "I'll do as I damn well please tonight. I'm keeping Meli and our family safe, and you're just trying to hold me back."

"No, I'm not." Raph drew his sai, just in case. "You're taking it too far. This isn't right, cutting them to pieces like that. It's not decent."

"Oh, look who's worried about decency now." Leo barked out a humorless laugh. "Looks like you're trying to change so Emma doesn't find out how heartless you can be. Joke's on her."

Whatever restraint Raph had tried to keep, it broke at Leo's dark words. He let out a cry and lunged for his older brother, sai meeting katana as Leo blocked his advance. Leo snarled something below his breath that only made Raph see more red, and he turned his shoulder into Leo and shoved, knocking his brother off-balance. Leo reacted by grabbing onto Raph's shoulder and yanking, taking his brother down with him. Their weapons clattered to the pavement as they drove their fists into one another, neither giving an inch, neither backing down. Raph felt someone pulling backward on his shell and tried to fight them off, but the screech of more sirens renting the air suddenly reminded him that they needed to go. He heaved himself to his feet, mindless of the blood oozing from his wounds, and stared down at Leo.

"This isn't over, Leo," he growled and turned away. "C'mon. We gotta move." He ran for the nearest alley, not bothering to see if his brothers were following or not. In fact, he didn't care right then if Leo was able to move. It would serve him right if the cops caught a glimpse of him. As he hauled himself up a fire escape, noting that at least two brothers were with him, he tried to calm his fury. It wouldn't serve him now the way he wanted it to, and they still had more phantoms to take down. _And take down my way, not Leo's. He's finished leading this team._ He cleared the top of the fire escape and breathed deep. _My team now, and my rules._


	4. Beat

I don't own the Turtles. I'm just borrowing them.

I had some extra time this week, and wanted to get this chapter up. Thank you for the reviews on chapter three, and for the follows and favorites. Merry Christmas to all of you!

BREATHE

CHAPTER FOUR: BEAT

Leo stood on the edge of the roof and watched as the ambulance crew checked the girl over. His heart rate was back to normal, and he breathed deep of the warm June night air. His brothers had vanished into the night without him, and he knew he'd lost Donnie and Mikey to Raph. A touch of anger shivered down through his blood, but he forced it back. His anger, his righteous fury, had already done enough damage tonight. _I just want Meli and our family to be safe. Why doesn't Raph see that? _But he knew his younger brother did. Leo glanced down at the yellow blood staining his lower legs and feet, and heaved out a deep sigh. He'd lost control again, and let the deep-seated rage rush through him, driving his actions. Still, those two phantoms he'd destroyed would no longer be sucking the life out of the city's citizens. That was two less who could harm Meli. She was the most important person in the world to him, and if he'd had to do it over, he'd have done the same thing.

Turning away from the edge of the roof, he sprinted in the opposite direction. He figured he knew where his brothers would've gone, and it wasn't going to take long to catch up. Leaping across the gaps in the buildings, he spotted them on a roof three buildings away, and slowed his speed. What was he going to say? He wasn't backing down on what he'd done. No, he wouldn't take back anything he'd done that night. Maybe he'd been out-of-control, but it was with good intentions. Never would he let these things hurt Meli. She was his heart, and damned if he'd back down from taking them apart.

Raph glanced at him when he walked up to them, but didn't speak. Mikey didn't look at him, and Donnie's furtive glance was shadowed with anxiety. Leo said nothing, merely stepped to the edge of the building and looked down. There was a group of Dragons milling about, outside a bar, and two of them were off to themselves, looking about ready to break into a fight. Leo's eyes narrowed behind his mask, and he collected himself, ready to jump. Raph reached out and grabbed his forearm, and Leo had to suck in a deep breath to stay the fury that wanted to surface.

"Don't interfere," Raph told him. His voice was low and stern. "We're just here for phantoms."

"I know that." Leo's voice was curt. "And you don't think those creatures would be hanging around, watching for an opportunity to suck a couple of those thugs dry?"

Raph glanced at him, and the disquiet in his eyes gave Leo pause. "Yeah, I do. And that's why we're here, watching over them."

"Fine," Leo huffed out. He crossed his arms over his chest and tried to hold in his bad temper, but it wasn't easy. At some point, he'd have to let it out, and that would trigger things with Raph again.

Leo's phone went off and he turned away, grabbing it. "Meli? You okay?" His heart beat harder.

"Just checking in," she told him, her voice soft. "We're okay. How's it going?"

He didn't want to lie to her, but knew she wouldn't be happy with the truth, either. "Raph and I got into it, over my leadership skills," he finally said.

"Are you all right?" Her concern was instantaneous, and much-appreciated. At least she was still in his corner.

"Yeah," he said. He heard Raph shift, and glanced over his shoulder. His brother was making ready to leap. "I have to go. Love you." He ended the call before she could get anything else out, and jammed his phone back into its place on his belt. Raph glanced at him.

"You ready?" he asked.

"Yes." Leo nodded and followed his brothers down as they dropped to street level. The Dragons saw them and some of them took off, but a few started taunting them and pulled knives. Leo rolled his eyes. When were they going to learn that they couldn't take on him and his brothers? Someone screamed and he charged, the spray can already in his hand. He sprayed the Dragon who was down in the street, and the phantom appeared. It was curled over the man's entire head, its mouth over his, sucking for all it was worth. Before he could bring his katana down, Raph had pierced its heart with his sai.

"Back off, Leo. It's finished already," he warned. "Just let it be."

But the rage was burning through his body, and he drew his katana anyway, and went to make a move. The blades didn't come down. He snarled and spun around. Donnie was standing there, shaking his head, his eyes narrowed behind his mask.

"No, Leo. Raph said to back off. It's dead already. Just leave it be," he said. There was such animosity in his voice that it threw Leo for a moment, and he lowered his swords. Why were they taking Raph's side of things?

"How do we know it doesn't having a healing factor?" he asked, his voice hot. "If it's in pieces, even if it does heal, it won't come back from that. We need to know for sure that they're dead."

Donnie's eyes softened. "I know you're worried about Meli. I'm afraid these things will hurt April, too. But this isn't the island, Leo. You can't go around hacking other living things to pieces. That's not you." His voice was low and firm, but not unkind.

Leo sighed. "Yeah, I get that." He rubbed a hand over his head. "But I need to know for _sure_ that they won't come back." He looked at Raph, who was quietly watching their exchange. The Dragon had gotten up and dragged himself off to the corner, where some of his friends were fussing over him, and watching them. "When that first phantom went through Meli, last night, it reminded her of when she almost drowned. I couldn't stop that feeling. I was helpless to protect her from it." He hung his head. "She was frightened, and she's still frightened. I can't let that continue. I just, I can't." He realized how broken he sounded, how weary. He didn't care. They needed to see that.

He felt a hand on his shoulder, and looked to see Mikey standing there, a fine sheen over his baby blue eyes. "We'll protect her, bro. We'll protect _all_ of the girls, and Splinter too." His voice was bordering on fierce, and Leo nodded, unable to smile for him. "But Donnie's right – you can't keep hacking those things to pieces. It's pretty gross."

Leo did smile then, and nodded. "I know." His smile faded quickly. "But do you guys see why I'm doing what I'm doing? Meli was terrified when that thing went through her. I can't let them roam around the city any longer." His voice grew hard, and cold filtered into it. Raph let out a deep sigh and walked over.

"Yeah, we get that. I don't want them touchin' Emma, either. But when you do that, whack 'em to pieces, it's too much like the island. You're losing control of your rage again." His tone was just as cold and hard as Leo's. "I won't let you do that, Leo. That's why I'm running the rest of the mission tonight."

Leo stared at the ground, willing himself to keep the rage at bay. _They still don't understand. I have to protect Meli. She's frightened and I can't let these things die in peace. It has to be this way._ He turned away, and Donnie stepped into his line of sight. "Leo, listen to Raph. He's right. We can't let you keep doing this. Maybe you should go back to the lair."

Raising his head, Leo stared Donnie in the eyes. Donnie swallowed hard but stood his ground. "You don't know that they can't regenerate, Don. I have to make sure they can't," Leo said.

"I know. And as soon as we get back tonight, I'll run that blood sample and see what I can learn from it," Donnie told him. "But you need to stand down, and let Raph run the team tonight."

Leo shook his head, frustrated and not able to figure out how to get his point across. "That's fine, you running the samples. But that doesn't do anything for me right now." He started to walk away, and Raph moved to get in his way. "Raph, you don't want to do this," he warned.

"Yeah, I do." Raph touched the sai at his waist. "Look, I get how scared Meli is. I saw the fear in her eyes last night when we talked. April is afraid, too. And rightly so. But that doesn't mean you give in and act like an animal like you did on the island. That doesn't fly here."

Before Leo could say anything, there was an explosion, throwing them all to the ground. Leo head whacked the cement, and stars danced behind his eyes. He heard shouting, and someone was shaking his shoulder. Dazed, he found himself being lifted up, and Raph was staring into his eyes. "Leo? Leo, you all right? Answer me!"

"I-I'm okay, I think. What was that?" Leo asked.

"Don't know, but that building over there's on fire. C'mon." Raph let go of him and turned, racing away for the edge of the building they were on. Leo swayed and went down on one knee. His brothers were already leaping across to the next building, and he pushed himself to his feet. His stomach clenched and he bent, retching onto the pavement at his feet. His head was spinning, and he couldn't focus. Groaning, and knowing he didn't have time for this, he gamely followed his brothers. But when he reached the gap, and put one foot up on the edge to jump, he stopped. His vision swam, and he turned away, retching again.

"Leo!" Donnie was beside him, one hand on his shoulder. "You're hurt. I need to get you back to the lair."

"I'm fine. Go. Help whoever needs it," Leo said, shaking his head. This proved to be the wrong thing to do, and he collapsed to the ground, his vision blurring out.

"You're not fine." Donnie knelt and put a gentle hand on his head. "He's hurt!" he yelled out, presumably to Raph and Mikey, Leo figured.

"Take him home," Raph said, his voice close to Leo's head. "Leo, I'm sending ya home with Donnie. Mikey and I will run surveillance, see if we can figure out what happened."

Leo wanted to argue, but couldn't, not with the proof of his injury sprayed across the cement at his knees. He pushed himself up and Donnie put an arm around him, keeping him steady. "Raph – be careful," Leo warned.

"We will." Raph looked at Donnie. "Get him home, get him better." He turned on his heel. Mikey was waiting by the edge of the roof, looking anxious. "Mike – let's go." And they were gone, leaping across the gap and racing toward the burning building. Below, down on the streets, they could hear the wailing of the fire trucks and police cars. Leo winced.

"Easy, I've got you," Donnie said. He started leading Leo over to the edge. "We need to get you down on the street." It sounded easy enough, but once they got there, and Leo had to look down, his vision swam again. He shuddered. "We'll take it slow," Donnie encouraged. He dropped down onto the fire escape and looked up at Leo, holding out his hands. "Just sit down and slide over. I'll catch you," Donnie told him.

"Easy for you to say," Leo muttered, but did as told. He trusted his younger brother to catch him. As he pushed off the ledge, he had to fight to keep his eyes open. Donnie caught him and eased him onto the fire escape.

"Okay, down we go," Donnie said, and taking hold of Leo's hand, led him down the stairs until they reached the alleyway. Leo knew if his head didn't hurt so bad, he'd feel like a child, being led around like this, but he needed the guidance. They kept to the back streets and alleys, and finally reached a manhole cover that Donnie knew was close to their home. He lifted the lid and nodded for Leo to go first.

Leo hit the dirt in the tunnel and his stomach heaved. He was shivering, and he hoped they weren't far from the lair. Donnie touched his shoulder. "We're almost home," he said, his voice low and gentle. "You must've whacked your head on the pavement when that explosion went off."

"Yeah, it hurts," Leo said.

"I'll check you over when we get back." Donnie had his arm around Leo's waist, and Leo leaned heavily on him. They were quiet for a little ways, and then Donnie said, his voice soft, "I know you're scared for Meli. You're scared that you're going to lose her, but you can't act like a crazy turtle out there."

Leo huffed out a breath. "They were in the lair, Donnie. We have to get rid of them before they kill one of us."

Donnie tensed. "We won't let that happen."

"How, though? I mean, you said that you and Mikey thought you'd run the phantoms off, but how did you know?"

"I don't know, we just did." Donnie shook his head. "We got three of them tonight, and I don't know how many there are out there."

Leo sighed. His head was pounding, and he was sick to his stomach, and he wanted nothing more than to lie down in bed with Meli curled up to his side. He didn't know what else to say, and he wasn't sure how much longer he'd be standing, let alone walking. The lair came into sight, though, and Donnie scooped him up in his arms. "I can walk," Leo growled.

"Not anymore you can't." Donnie's tone was no-nonsense. He jumped over the turnstiles, and immediately the three girls were there.

"Leo." Meli's voice was full of fear, and he struggled against Donnie's hold. Donnie didn't let go.

"He hit his head pretty hard," Donnie said. "I need to check him over in the lab." He carried Leo into the lab and set him down gently on the table. Meli was immediately there, reaching to caress Leo's cheek.

"How did this happen?" she asked, watching Leo's eyes.

"There was an explosion, close to where we were," Leo said. He closed his eyes; the lights in the lab were very bright, and hurt at the moment.

"Are Raph and Mikey okay?" Emma asked.

"They're fine," Donnie told her. "They stayed behind to do some surveillance and see if anyone needed help." He lifted each of Leo's eyelids, and made murmuring noises beneath his breath. "How many fingers is Meli holding up?" he asked. Meli obligingly held four fingers up in front of Leo's eyes.

He blinked. "Four."

"Good." Donnie nodded. "I think he's got a concussion, judging from his eyes and the problems his stomach is having."

"His stomach?" Meli asked.

"Lots of vomiting," Donnie told her. Leo rolled his eyes. "I'm going to keep him here in the lab for a little bit, and then once he feels better we'll move him to your guys' room."

"Okay." Meli put her hand on Leo's upper arm, giving it a gentle squeeze. "I'm sorry you got hurt," she whispered, and kissed his cheek.

"I'll be fine," he assured her. Donnie gave him something for his headache, and he soon fell asleep, his dreams full of shouting and flames and loud noises. He was awakened twice by Donnie and Meli, to make sure he was doing okay, and that broke up the horrific dreams. He wasn't sure how long he was out this time; when he awoke some time later, Meli was curled up in a chair, a blanket draped over her. No one else was in the lab, and the lights had been dimmed. He swallowed, his mouth dry and terrible-tasting, and sat up.

And promptly lay back down. The room was spinning, and he sucked in a gasping breath. He'd had plenty of injuries before, but not with his head. _This sucks. _He looked over at Meli, and a warm feeling filled his heart. She would've been much more comfortable resting in their bed, or out on the couch, but she'd chosen to stay as close to him as she could. He closed his eyes. He knew he didn't deserve her – he never had. And especially not now that he was damaged. A soft sigh slipped from his mouth. He was well-aware that he'd crossed the line tonight, and let that animal instinct take over. It was unlikely that the phantoms had a healing factor, so a quick pierce through the heart had been enough to kill them. They hadn't needed to be hacked up.

_But when it comes to Meli and her safety, I have to do whatever it takes, even if that means letting the rage go again._ His love for her was too immense to ever be correctly measured. If something ever happened to her, he knew he'd die from his broken heart. He was sure of that.

"Leo?" Her sweet voice made him smile, and he opened his eyes. She was at his side, her hazel eyes full of worry and concern.

"I'm okay," he whispered. "Can I have some water?"

"Sure." She quickly got him a glass and helped him sit up to drink it. "I think my heart stopped when I saw Donnie carrying you," she confessed, her voice low.

He reached out to touch her cheek. "I'll be fine. I feel better than I did," he told her. "Are Raph and Mikey back yet?"

"Not yet." She took his hand and squeezed it between her own. "Donnie told me what happened out here, before the explosion." Her voice was soft, tentative. "Leo, you have to keep that rage under control."

"I know," he snapped. She bit her lip and looked down. "I'm sorry, love. I know I freaked the guys out. But I want those phantoms put down for good, so they can't kill anyone else." He gave her hands a squeeze. "But I know I crossed the line tonight."

"You're worried about something happening to me," she said, looking him in the eye. "And that's okay. But you know I can handle myself, too."

And he knew she could. She'd been training with the tonfa ever since she'd gotten them, and she was good. Very good, in fact, and most of the time, when the two girls were out running with them, he didn't worry about her. Much. But these phantoms were different. Up until tonight, they hadn't had any way of finding them, of seeing them. And they still couldn't just find them – they had to wait until the little suckers were trying to kill someone, drawing attention to them.

"I know you're good, Meli. You train hard, and you're a natural with the tonfa. But I've almost lost you more times than I care to remember, and I need to make sure those things are dead," he told her.

The door opened, and Raph stepped in. He shut the door behind him and approached. He was streaked black with soot and the fire in his green eyes spoke volumes about how he was feeling. "You all right?" he asked, stopping next to the table.

"I will be," Leo told him. "What about the explosion?"

Raph sighed. "Not sure what caused it, but the rumors we heard on the street lean toward it being the same person who started that fire by Emma's last night."

"That's not good," Meli said, shaking her head. "Are you and Mikey okay?"

"Yeah, we're good. There weren't many people inside, and I think everyone got out," Raph said. "We got another phantom too, on the way back." He locked gazes with Leo. "And I made sure it wasn't getting back up." His voice was hard.

"Thank you," Leo said, nodding. His head was throbbing, and he rubbed at his eyes.

"You need rest," Meli said, and gave his hand a squeeze. "Do you want me to have Donnie check you over?"

"No." Leo gave a slight shake of his head. "I'm just tired."

"Okay." She turned to go, and he stopped her. "Leo?"

"You don't have to go," he whispered.

She smiled. "I'll be right back, I promise." She left and Raph crossed his arms over his chest and studied his older brother.

"What?"

"You took a hard fall," Raph told him, frowning. "Donnie's pretty worried."

"I'm fine, Raph." Leo closed his eyes. The room stopped spinning, and he let out a quiet sigh.

"I'll check on ya later," Raph said and left, gently closing the door behind him.

Leo inhaled and exhaled, just concentrating on his breathing. He did feel some better, but not enough to get up and do anything. Meli came back and covered him with a heavy quilt, laying it over the thinner blanket he had. "Love you," he murmured to her.

She kissed his cheek. "I love you, too. I'll be right here, in case you need anything."

"I just need you." His words were spoken beneath his breath, and he wasn't sure she even heard him, but it was the truth. As long as he had her, he was always going to be okay.

The next time he was awakened, he was feeling much better. Donnie was checking him over, fussing as usual, and he finally patted Leo on the shoulder. "You can get up now, if you want," he said. "But you'll have to take it easy. I don't think you should go out with us for a day or so."

"Not going to happen," Leo informed him. He swung off the table and nearly fell, but Donnie caught him around the waist and held him.

"Easy," Donnie warned. "How's your stomach feel?"

"Its fine," Leo said, trying not to sound like a jerk. "Is Meli okay?"

"She's sleeping right now. Raph made her go to bed," Donnie told him. "But she's fine, just exhausted. She refused to leave you. Raph pretty much had to drag her out of here."

"He said they got another phantom on the way back," Leo told him.

"Yeah, he told me." Donnie let go of him, and Leo balanced on his own. "I wish I knew how many of those things there were. I mean, maybe that was it. Maybe we got them all."

"You really believe that?" Leo cast a frown at him.

"No." Donnie shook his head. "The girls want to go out with us tonight."

Leo wasn't sure what to say to that. He knew April and Meli were more than capable to keeping up with him and his brothers, but did they want the girls out running tonight with them? "If they stick close to us, it should be okay," he finally said.

Donnie shook his head. "You aren't going out tonight, Leo. I know you really want to, but I'm putting my foot down. You've got a head injury, and we don't know yet how long it will take to heal."

"I'm fine." Leo walked away from him. "And I'm going." There was no way in hell he was staying home while his brothers, sister, and girlfriend were out there on patrol. He heard his brother heave a deep sigh but didn't care. He left the lab and headed toward his room. Raph saw him and got off the couch, where he'd been sitting with Emma. Leo inwardly groaned. "What?" he snapped when Raph stopped him.

Raph's eyes flashed. "You're not going with us tonight, Leo. You're hurt. You need to let that injury heal. And Meli's fine – she's sleeping. She's exhausted." There was a deep line of protection running through his voice, and Leo gritted his teeth. Sometimes, just sometimes, he wished Raph didn't have such a close bond with Meli. But he swallowed back his irritation and sighed.

"I'm going. And I won't wake her up – I just need to see her," he said. He started to walk by Raph, but his younger brother wasn't ready to let him go just yet.

"It's for your own good, Leo. And right now, I'm the better one to run this team," Raph growled, reaching out and stopping Leo. "Admit it. You crossed the line tonight."

Leo jerked away from him, shoving Raph. "How many times have we gone out hurt before? You think this is new for me?" Leo touched his head. "I'm fine. And maybe I did cross the line, but at least we know those things aren't out there killing people now." He strode by Raph, who shoved him back, and knocked him down.

"Yeah, you're right. I should just let you go, watch you fall down when you try to jump the gaps." Raph bent down to get in his face. "You're staying _home_ tonight."

"What's going on?" Splinter's voice thundered across the room, and both boys jumped. Raph glared at Leo as their father approached them. "What is the fighting all about?" Splinter's voice was steel.

"I told Leo he's injured and staying home from patrolling tonight," Raph said, crossing his arms over his big plastron. "We're not exactly seein' eye-to-eye on leading the team, either."

"I see." Splinter tugged gently on his chin whiskers. Leo sighed loudly.

"I'm fine, Sensei. I'm not staying here when there're probably more of those phantoms lurking on the streets." He didn't add that there was no way he was letting Meli go topside without him, either. That would only make Raph madder.

Splinter said nothing, but suddenly struck out with his right fist, and hit Leo square in the chest. Leo couldn't recover and went down hard, his breath a gasp when he hit. His eyes wide, he stared up at his father. Splinter gave a shake of his head and leaned down to his eldest son. "You are not fine, Leonardo, and you are not going out on patrol tonight. That is final." He straightened and looked at Raph. "You will lead the team until I say."

"That's not fair!" Leo got to his feet, anger snapping in his blue eyes. His head spun and he swayed. Raph reached out and steadied him, a knowing smirk on his face. "Damn it, Raph, it's not funny," Leo growled.

"No, it's not, you're right," Raph said, nodding. "It's hilarious." He turned away. "Don't worry about the girls. We'll take care of them tonight."

"Meli's not going topside without me," Leo growled.

"Yes, I am." Her petal soft from behind him had him stiffening, and it seemed like the whole room went still, holding its breath to see what his reaction would be. He slowly turned to face her. She was tired; he could see the exhaustion in her eyes, and yet there was defiance there, too, stubborn will. He inwardly sighed.

"You won't be safe unless I'm with you," he told her. Behind her, he saw Raph's eyes narrow into slits.

"Leo, you're hurt. You need to stay here and let your head heal," Meli said. She stepped close to him and put her hand on his arm. "You know I can handle myself now. And there's no way Raph would let anything happen to me. Or the others, either." Her voice remained soft, but he didn't neglect the thread of iron in it. He knew better than that.

"Meli—"

"No, Leonardo. I'm going out there." She leaned in closer and stretched to kiss his cheek. "And you need to go lie down and let your body rest." She took his hand and tugged on it, and with a deep-seated sigh he allowed himself to be led to their room. He knew better than to look back at his family, because they'd all be grinning and smirking. After all, he was Fearless, the Captain, the leader. But not right now. Right now he was simply cowed by his girlfriend, who was small and delicate, and had an iron will of strength.

He knew when he was beat.


	5. Explosion

I don't own the Turtles. Please don't borrow Meli and Emma, though...I'll have two exceptionally cranky turtles on my hands. Thank you :-)

This chapter is shorter, but I really wanted to get it out to you all before Christmas. I hope you enjoy, and have a wonderful Christmas and a great New Year!

BREATHE

CHAPTER FIVE: EXPLOSION

Raph sat down on the couch and pulled Emma into his side, wrapping his strong arm around her and holding her tight. She snuggled against him, and he let out a soft sigh. He really, really needed this after what had gone down the night before. _I know Leo's afraid for Meli, but he can't be allowed to get crazy like that._ Emma put her hand on his arm and he tipped his head against hers.

"You can talk to me, you know," she whispered.

"Yeah, I know," he said. The problem was, he didn't really _want_ to talk about what had happened. That only kept in fresh in his mind.

"You're doing the right thing, keeping him home," she said. "I'll keep an eye on him."

"Thanks."

Emma pushed herself upright and turned to face him. "Raph, seriously. I know you don't want to talk because you think I don't want to hear it, but that's what I'm here for. I'm here for _you_." Her voice was soft, but the look in her green eyes was anything but. She meant business.

He sighed again. "Yeah, I know. But if I talk about it, it just stays fresh, ya know? I'm tired of thinking about it."

She touched his shoulder. "I know. But it's not a problem that's going away on its own. I don't know Leo well, or really at all, but I know this is something he's struggling with, after everything that happened to him. You're _all_ struggling with it. But he has Meli to help him, and Donnie has April, and Mikey, well, he seems to rebound off everyone else." She gave his plastron a hard poke. "And you have _me_. So, are you going to talk or am I just dragging it out of you, question by question?"

Raph couldn't help but chuckle at the ferocious glint in those eyes he loved so much. He grinned at her. "Okay, okay. We'll talk. But not out here." He got up and held his hand out to her, giving hers a squeeze as he led her toward their room. Once there, he closed the door and turned to her. She'd sat down on his bed and was waiting expectantly. "He went crazy last night," he said, sitting down on the bed. "The phantoms were dead, and he hacked 'em to pieces, literally. I don't know why. It's like a flip got switched in his head. He can't handle being out there right now."

"He's afraid for Meli. You mentioned before that she almost drowned, right? And that those creatures steal your breath?"

"Yeah, she almost drowned twice," he said, nodding. There was a tug in his heart, thinking back to the first time, when he'd had to give her mouth-to-mouth to bring her back. "And I know he's afraid something like that will happen again. But those creatures were already _dead_, Em. He didn't have to do what he did." He rubbed his hands over his face. "It was disturbing."

"I'm sure it was," she said softly. "And I know it's hard for you, watching him go through this. The best you can do is be there for him."

Raph lay back on the bed. "You make it sound like it's easy. It's not." There was a snap in his voice that he knew he wasn't fair to her, but he was still angry with Leo over what had gone on. "He wouldn't listen to us. It's not just me he has a problem with – it's Donnie and Mikey, too."

Emma was silent for a little while, and he appreciated the fact that she didn't feel the need to constantly talk. She could be quiet and it was okay. When she did finally speak, her husky voice was low. "Maybe he needs some time away from you guys, time away from the city."

"He had that, Em, for over a year."

"Yes, but it was spent fighting for his life." She leaned down over him. "Maybe he and Meli need to go on a vacation alone, go somewhere he won't need to hide who he is, somewhere he can work out all that rage floating around inside him."

Raph considered her words. He wasn't too sure he could let Leo take Meli somewhere alone; it wasn't that he didn't trust Leo, he just didn't trust him whole-heartedly. He wasn't sure he ever would. If last night's activities were any indication, his older brother had a very long way to go before he'd earn that complete trust back.

"Just think about it, okay? Maybe you could suggest it to Meli first, see what she thinks. She's quite level-headed."

"Yeah, she is." Raph tugged on a strand of her honey-blonde hair. "You girls all get along all right?"

"We did," she said, nodding. "April seems a little distant, but I know she's worried about everything going on."

"Yeah, and she's more defensive of us, too. I mean, Meli knows what it's like, bein' the new girl, you know?"

Emma nodded. There was a knock at the door, and when Raph told the person to come in, Meli poked her head in. "Hey," Raph said. "What is it?"

Meli frowned. "They're talking about that explosion on the news, and it sounds like there's an arsonist running around the city now."

"Great. All we need," Raph groused. "We'll check into it tonight. You're going with us, right?"

She flashed him a grin. "Of course."

"All right. We'll head about eight or so," he told her. She nodded and shut the door, and he let out a loud groan. "Ya know, having the phantoms runnin' around is bad enough, but now they think there's a crazy person purposely setting fires?" He swore low under his breath.

"You'll be very careful, right?" Emma said, watching him closely.

"Yeah, we're always careful." He touched her cheek. "You be careful with Leo, too. He's not the same turtle that left us." There was pain in his voice. "Before he went with Karai, he was probably the most trust-worthy person I knew. Now, well, he's not."

She nodded, her countenance solemn. "I will. And I think he will get better, Raph. It'll just take time."

_Time. What if he's had time and hasn't gotten better? What if he never gets better? _The thought was cruel, and sliced through his heart. He knew Meli was in it for the long haul with his brother, and Splinter would never desert his eldest, but could his siblings take him if he never got better? He liked to think so, but if Leo's rage ended up winning the battle, there was no way he'd let him be around Emma or April. And that was something he, Donnie, and Mikey would have to face, sooner rather than later, if the behavior continued.

"Hey." Emma moved in close to him and pressed her lips to his mouth. He wrapped his arms around her and pulled her down across his massive plastron, cradling her tight to him. She was so warm and accommodating, and he wished he could just stay here forever with her, and not have to face all the hard decisions that were going to have to be made. She eased away from him after several moments, and smiled down at him. "Everything will be okay, Raphael. I know right now it doesn't seem like it, but life has a funny way of working things out. You'll see."

_Yeah, but for the better?_ He didn't voice aloud his question, because he didn't want to offend her. She was trying to be upbeat for him, and he loved her for that. He kissed her again, longer this time, and had a hard time letting the moment go. But they had things to do, places to investigate, and he had to make sure his head was on straight. After all, without Leo out there on the roofs, he'd be responsible for Meli and her well-being. And no one was going to hurt her.

Three hours later, they were running the roofs. Mikey was out front with April, Donnie was the middle point, and Raph and Meli brought up the rear guard. Raph looked over at his dark-haired sister, and saw the determination lining her delicate face. Leo hadn't been happy with her for going, and they'd spoken some heated words. Raph hated that Leo's actions were causing them to have problems, but he wasn't sure how to help. He really wasn't even sure Meli wanted his help. But he couldn't help but feel responsible for her, because during the time Leo had been missing, he'd been the one to step up and take care of her the best he could.

"Raph, you're staring," she said, glancing at him. He frowned and reached out, taking her wrist and stopping her. The others continued on to the next roof. "What?" she said, irritated.

"You need a clear head for this, Mel," he told her. "I know you've got stuff goin' on with Leo, but you can't stay with me if you aren't in the game tonight."

Her mouth dropped open, and she stared at him for several seconds. "You really think I'm not ready tonight for this? Really, Raphael?" Her tone was hard and bitter, and she shoved her past him. "Just stay out of my way."

Raph took hold of her wrist, mindful always of his incredible strength, and swung her around to face him. This wasn't her, the Meli he knew and cared for. "You heard me, sis. Either get it together, or I'm sending you back." He let just enough ice creep into his voice that she'd know he meant business, and not to mess with him. She dropped her gaze to the top of the roof, and he waited a few heartbeats for her to say something, anything. "Mel." He tipped her chin up, and was instantly horrified by the shine of tears in her eyes. "Hey, what's goin' on?" he asked, his voice now quiet.

She shook her head. "Nothing. Sorry. You're right. I need to get my head on straight." She swallowed hard and sniffed, and smiled.

He shook his head. "Not buyin' it."

"Raph, please, just drop it for now, okay? I'm fine, really." Her gaze went beyond him, and her mouth tightened. "Something must've happened. They're dropping down." She tried to go past him, and he kept hold of her wrist. "Come on," she urged.

"You'd tell me if he's doing something to hurt ya, right?" His voice was solemn, and she stopped, huffing out a breath, her eyes locking on his. "He's my brother, and I love him, but if he's hurting you…" He let the sentence, with its heavy weight, drift off into the night. Meli said nothing, didn't seem capable of finding her voice right then. He touched her cheek. "Just know that you can tell me, okay?" He let go of her and turned, his body shifting into battle-readiness. "Come on. Stay close to me." Then he was gone, running hard, the cooler air of the night flattening his mask to his face. He reached the end of the roof they were on and stopped, waiting. Meli wasn't yet able to make the leaps across the roofs, though they'd been working on that, and she was getting much more confident. But tonight, he knew her head wasn't in it, and damned if he'd let her try the leaps and end up falling. No one was going to fall on his watch.

"Raph." Meli drew to a stop next to him, barely winded from her sprint, and shook her head. "It's not Leo." Her voice was soft.

"No?"

"No. I know he's not been himself lately, and I am worried about him, but that's not the reason for my funk tonight." She shook her head. "I don't want to get into it right now, but I'll tell you later, okay?" She finally met his gaze. "Let's just do this." She took a step closer to him and he swept her up into his arms, backed up a couple of steps, and launched them through the air to the next building. They caught up with the rest of the team quickly, and dropped down to the pavement below.

"Donnie? What is it?" Raph asked, not immediately spying anything to be concerned about.

"There was a small portal open here," Donnie said, looking at him. "We didn't seen anything come out of it, or go back in, but I'm still worried."

"You think the phantoms are using it?" Raph asked. He noticed Meli drifting away from him, and frowned, his eyes on her.

"It was small, so yes, they could be," Donnie said. He'd been kneeling down and got to his feet, reaching for April's hand and drawing her closer to him.

"Meli. Hey," Raph called. She'd walked away from them and was staring intently at the building across the street. He didn't like her being so far away from him, and started to walk over to her. She suddenly turned and yelled for all of them to get down, and the building exploded.

Raph wasn't sure how long he'd been out; his ears were ringing and something heavy was lying across his body. He sat up and rubbed at his eyes, and realized the weight was smashed brick. His eyes widened in horror, and he remembered what had happened. He heaved himself to his feet and quickly scanned the surrounding area. Mikey was down near the alley; the youngest turtle was starting to squirm around, and Raph turned his attention to the others. Donnie was lying across April, and debris was heaped all around them, but neither seemed to be too injured.

"Meli!" he yelled, turning in circles, searching for her. She was wearing mostly black, to help blend into the night, and now she was blending into the chaotic mess too well. He spotted something ten feet away and sprinted to it, his breath freezing when he saw her trapped beneath a large chunk of the building's wall. "Meli," he breathed, tapping her cheek. She was extremely pale, and he wasn't sure she was breathing. He grabbed hold of the section of wall and pulled, managing to slide it off of her. "Meli, c'mon, can you hear me?" Wanting to pick her up, and not sure how injured she was, he found himself wishing he had paramedic training. _Donnie. He'll know if she's okay to move._ He ran back to his brothers, who were both up and helping April to her feet.

"Donnie, Meli's hurt. I don't know how badly," Raph said. "I've got April and Mike. Go see if you can help her." His voice was hard and commanding, because right now he couldn't afford to be too caring. Donnie nodded and ran to Meli without any hesitation, and Raph wrapped his arms around his two siblings. April leaned heavily on him, and he kissed the top of her head. "You okay, April?" he asked.

"I think so," she said, nodding. She quickly winced. "Okay, maybe not. I'm pretty dizzy."

"I've got ya. Just stay still," he told her. "Mike? What about you?"

Mikey managed to flash him a thumbs-up, and he knew his baby brother was hurt. Raph's vision began to edge with red, and he forced it away. Anger would gain him nothing right now. He looked to where Donnie was kneeling over Meli. There were sirens wailing in the distance, an all-too-familiar sound these last few days, and he knew they had to go. "Mikey, hang onto April, okay?" He stepped back and let the two cling to each other, and ran over to Meli. She was still out, and he saw the tension in Donnie's tall frame.

"She's hurt pretty badly," Donnie told him, shaking his head. "She's breathing, but it's labored. I don't know if I've got enough gear back in the lair to help her." Raph stared at him, and Donnie said, his voice extremely quiet, "We might have to leave her, Raph, and let the paramedics take her to the hospital."

"No." Raph's reaction was immediate and angry. "You can fix her. You've always managed to fix us."

"But she was so close to the blast," Donnie said. "If she has internal injuries, she's going to need surgery, and I don't know if I'll be prepared enough for that."

"You've done surgery on us before," Raph argued, his voice hot. "We are not leaving her."

"Surgery on _us_, Raphael, yes. But not on a _human_," Donnie said, his voice just as angered. "What happens if I have to operate, and it's a lot worse than I'd expected? She could _die_."

Raph knelt down and put his hand on Meli's shoulder, giving it a gentle shake. Inside he was screaming at her, willing her to at least moan or do anything to indicate she would be okay to move, to take with them.

"We have to decide right now, Raph. Those sirens are getting closer, and people are going to be wondering what happened," Donnie prodded, gazing at him.

Raph inhaled deeply. Every instinct told him not to leave her, to take her back to the lair and let Donnie do what he could. _But what if he's right? What if she's bleeding badly inside? She'll die without the right medical help. _But looking down at her face, at the girl he'd come to know and love deeply as a sister, he couldn't leave her. He just couldn't.

"Raph." Donnie's voice was dark with anger. "You have to decide _now_."

Raph knew that. His heart hurt it was beating so fast and hard, and he tried to rouse her again, this time shaking both shoulders. The sirens were so close now and he could see the blues and reds of them thrown against the walls of the surrounding buildings. Mikey and April were in the closest ally, watching them, and Donnie was on his feet, anxious. _I don't want to leave her. I don't know if she'll be safe. What if someone hurts her more or—_Meli suddenly moaned and coughed, and he felt tears of relief in his eyes. He gently, as gently as possible, lifted her into his strong arms and rose to his feet, nodding to Donnie. As long as she was conscious, there was no way he was leaving her behind.

They couldn't take to the roofs, and so kept to the alleyways and dark streets as they headed home. Raph glanced down constantly at Meli, making sure she was still breathing. She coughed every now and again, and she was pale, but her heart seemed to be strong. Donnie was carrying April, who curled tightly into his secure hold. Raph could see her shoulders shaking, and cursed the person who'd blown up the building. Mikey dragged himself along, dejected and hurting, next to Raph, glancing at Meli at five minutes. Raph wanted to reassure him that she was okay, but couldn't. He couldn't lie to his little brother.

_It's going to be okay. I can get them all home, take care of them. Meli will be just fine – Donnie can fix her up. I know he can._ As they made their way through the dark of the June night, Raph kept repeating those words in his head, and kept putting one foot in front of the other.


	6. Blame

I don't own the Turtles or their associated peoples. But Meli and Emma are mine, so please don't borrow. The boys will be very, very upset.

Had time to get another chapter done. Hope everyone had a wonderful Christmas, and here's hoping to an awesome New Year! Thank you for hanging in there with me through the "Stronger" series. I'm not nearly finished yet, and hope to keep going after this story is over.

BREATHE

CHAPTER SIX: BLAME

Leo watched the baseball game on TV, trying to pay attention to the team batting. He wasn't a huge sports fan, but he did enjoy watching the Mets play. He knew being a sort-of Mets fan, or any fan of the team, really, was considered madness by many in the city. The Yankees had long been the favorite of the Big Apple, but he liked the whole underdog feeling the Mets had going on. He glanced over at Emma, who was curled up in the recliner Raph usually sat in, a writing pad in her lap. Her pen was poised over the paper, and she was staring into space. He smiled a little and refocused on the game. His focus didn't last long, though, as she got up and started wandering around the room, a frown on her pretty face.

"Everything okay?" Leo asked, feeling it was his duty to keep an eye on her for Raph. He knew Raph was doing the exact same thing with Meli. "Emma?"

"Oh." She stopped and turned toward him, and smiled, her face reddening a little. "I'm just trying to work out a couple things for a book I'm writing, and not having an easy time of it." Her voice was soft and husky, and while Leo was immune to its charm, he could tell why his brother wasn't. Raph had always been a fan of girls with blonde hair and sultry voices, and Emma was his dream walking.

"Sounds like an interesting problem," Leo told her. He didn't offer to help, not knowing anything about writing. And, to be honest, he wasn't sure he was up for a full conversation. He was angry about being left behind, when he felt he was fully-capable of fighting. A dull ache rippled through his head and he rubbed at it, hating that he'd been injured. _I'd have been okay up there tonight. Raph should've let me go._

"Are you okay?"

He looked up to see Emma standing to the side of him, her arms folded across her chest. "Yeah."

"You don't sound too sure of that," she said. She gestured to the couch. "May I?"

"Sure." He shifted over a little, not comfortable with her sitting so close to him. She was his brother's girlfriend, yes, but he didn't know her, not really. And he'd learned to be guarded. He didn't think she was here to harm any of them; he'd watched her and Raph enough to know that she really seemed to love his younger brother, and vice-versa, but he was still uneasy with someone new in the lair. Especially since it was just them. Splinter was meditating, and Leo knew better than to disturb his father.

"Does your head feel okay?" she asked.

"It's fine." His voice was clipped, as was his response, and he knew if Raph were here, he'd probably pound on him for it. "It throbs every once in a while," he amended.

"Best that you stayed here tonight," she told him. Her tone was no-nonsense, but not unkind. "I'm sure Raphael is very capable of running the team."

He turned his head to look at her. "I think maybe you're prejudiced," he said, a small smile on his face.

"Maybe," she conceded with a smile. "But he really is trying his best to look out for you. For all of them."

"Yeah, I know." But it still burned. This was his family too, and it was _his_ team. "As long as he keeps Meli and the others safe, it's okay."

"You know he'll do his best," she said.

"Better than his best," Leo told her.

She nodded, and set her notepad and pen down on the floor. "How have things been going since you came home?"

He shifted, uncomfortable with the question. Or maybe it was the person asking. He glanced at her, saw that she was waiting for his answer, an expectant look on her face. He shrugged. "Good as it can be."

She considered his answer, which he guessed was nice, before saying, "Sounds like it's been rough."

He didn't want to be having this conversation. Emma was supposed to be a writer, not a shrink. He got to his feet. "I'm getting something to drink. Want anything?" Though he didn't want to talk about what was going on, he wasn't going to be rude.

"I'll come with you." She got up and followed him to the kitchen, and he inhaled and exhaled slowly several times, trying to calm himself. So she didn't want to give up the conversation. Raph had said she could be quite stubborn. A momentary grin graced his face. She fit right in with the other two women in their lives in that respect.

He grabbed a Coke and nodded to her. She peeked into the fridge. "I'll take a Coke, too," she said. He grabbed another one and handed it to her. She unscrewed the cap, her green eyes on him. He felt like squirming.

"Look, I really don't want to talk about what happened last night," he finally said, exhaling a huge breath. "I did what I felt was right."

"You let your anger get the best of you, you mean," Emma said, leaning back against the counter.

His eyes flared wide. "You weren't there. And no offense, you haven't been here for long. You don't know me at all."

"I realize that. But I _do_ know Raph, and I know he's doing what he feels is best, too. You still aren't your old self, Leonardo. Even I can see that." Her voice was soft, non-threatening, and Leo huffed out a breath. He wasn't about to get into it with her, and he knew she was talking to him out of concern. He could appreciate that, even if he didn't like it.

"Look, I'm glad you're dating Raph. You seem like a great fit for him," he said. "But we don't know each other, and I'd appreciate it if you didn't try to psycho-analyze me." He kept his tone as friendly as he could, but he was done with this, and with her. He turned around and headed out of the kitchen, only to stop cold.

"Meli." Her name slipped from his mouth in a frenzied breath, and he sprinted for the turnstiles, where Raph was gently easing himself over, Meli cradled in his strong arms. Leo drew up short at the sight of his girlfriend, pale, bleeding, and limp, and the fury rushed like flame through his system. He reached out to take her, only to have Raph turn his shoulder into him.

"Don't," he barked, and bulled his way past his older brother. Leo reacted instantly, reaching for him, but Mikey got in the way, shaking his head, his baby blue eyes radiating his own anger.

"Don't, Leo. She's hurt bad. Donnie's gonna try to help her," he said. There was a sense of pleading in his voice, but also a line of steel, and Leo tried to pull himself together. He pushed Mikey out of the way and followed his other two brothers and April to the lab, where Raph set Meli down, as gently as he possibly could.

"Is she—" Leo drew in a deep breath. "Is she breathing?"

"Yeah." Raph's tone was dark with anger but also loathing, and Leo realized his brother was blaming himself for her injuries. He took another breath, blowing it out softly through his mouth. He needed to stay calm. Meli needed him.

"What happened?" he asked, trying to calm himself. Letting the fury take over, although easier, wasn't the best thing to do right now. Later, after he knew his girlfriend was going to be okay, he might feel differently. "Raphael? What happened out there?"

Raph was breathing fast, and he backed away from the table as Donnie set down some medical supplies on a stool next to the table. Donnie nudged him out of the way, carefully, and Raph turned to Leo. His distress and shock showed deep in his emerald eyes, and at once, Leo's fury fled. His younger brother was falling apart, and he couldn't yell at him, couldn't blame him for what had happened. Later, maybe, but not now. He simply held his arms out toward Raph, and he fell into them, a low sob breaking from his throat.

"My fault," he whispered against Leo's shoulder. "I'm so sorry. She got hurt because of me."

Leo wasn't sure he could offer denial of that, but nor could he not offer comfort to him. "She knows the dangers of running with us," he said, his voice low. He patted Raph's shell. "What happened?"

"An explosion." Raph pulled back, dashed an angry fist across his eyes. "Building went up, and Meli was pretty close to it. Closer than we were." He met Leo's gaze. "She woke up, but we're not sure how bad her injuries are." He nodded toward where Donnie was leaning over Meli, softly speaking to her. "We thought about leaving her for the paramedics, because we don't know how hurt she is, but I couldn't. I just couldn't leave her there." The pain in his voice was harsh and deep.

"You made the right choice," Leo told him. He patted his brother's shoulder and walked around to the other side of the table. "Meli." He touched her cheek. She opened her eyes, and he sucked in his breath at the suffering in them. "It's going to be okay, love," he whispered, bending to press a kiss to her forehead. She made a slight moaning sound.

"Leo?"

"I'm here, sweetheart," he murmured. He straightened and looked across at Donnie. "She going to be okay?" He tried not to sound overly-anxious, but it was difficult.

"I don't know yet." Donnie turned to Raph. "You guys should go. She's going to be in pain while I examine her, and I'm not sure you two can take it." His voice was direct but not mean. He knew how much Meli meant to both Raph and Leo. She meant a great deal to the rest of the family too, but especially to them.

"No." Raph glanced at Leo, and back at Donnie. "She needs us, Donatello."

"He's right. She's hurting. She needs us here," Leo said, nodding in agreement with Raph.

Donnie sighed. He motioned to someone behind Raph. "Will you talk to them?" he called out. Both Raph and Leo turned to see Emma and April standing there, but Emma shook her head.

"They're right. Meli's in a lot of pain, and she needs her boyfriend and big brother," Emma told him. "April and I will take care of Mikey."

"She's right. We'll be out here if you need us, Donnie," April said. She looked tired and worn out to Leo, and he frowned, wishing mightily he'd been there with them tonight. Maybe he could've prevented what had happened.

"I'm going to need you here, April, if you can manage," Donnie told her, his voice soft. He glanced down at Meli, and Leo saw the worry in his brown eyes.

"Okay." April stepped in and walked over to the table, putting her small hand on Donnie's shoulder in a reassuring way. "I'm here, sweetie."

Emma came in and stopped beside Raph, giving him a hug. "You okay?" she asked him, and they had a whispered conversation for a few moments. She kissed him and left, and Raph turned to the others.

"Well, what're you waiting for?" he asked, his tone brusque.

Donnie and April began working over Meli, who elicited soft sounds of pain from time to time, causing Leo to cringe as he held her left hand. He exchanged glances with Raph, who stood closer to Meli's feet, his eyes glued to her pale face. After several minutes, Donnie shook his head and backed away from them. He was mumbling to himself, and Leo didn't like that.

"Donnie? Can you help her?" he asked.

Donnie looked up and met his gaze. "She's hurt pretty badly, Leonardo." He shook his head, breathing deep. "I can do a scan, see if there're internal injuries, but that's going to take a little while. I don't have the equipment the hospitals do, and if she _is_ bleeding inside, well," he made a helpless gesture, "we're wasting time."

Meli's eyelids fluttered, and she forced her eyes open, gazing up at Leo. His heart pounded as he considered what Donnie was really telling him. If they waited for his equipment to do the scan, and she was bleeding badly, she could die. "Hey." Meli reached out and touched Leo's plastron. He leaned down closer to her. "Let Donnie do it," she whispered. "I don't think I'm hurt that bad."

Leo trusted his girlfriend's instincts, but what if she was wrong? He saw tears glisten in her hazel eyes, and said, "Do it, Donnie." His voice was soft but edged with the steel that came from years of leading their team, and Donnie immediately got his equipment out. He began the process of scanning Meli's slender form. Leo held her hand, even though he knew it didn't hurt. It took several minutes for the scan to be done, and Donnie nodded to Leo.

"This will take a few minutes for me to go through the data," he said. He and April walked over to his bank of computers, and Leo looked down at his girlfriend.

"Hang in there," he said, his voice quiet but firm. "Donnie can fix you up."

"I know." Meli swallowed hard, and he looked up at Raph as his younger brother came closer.

"I'll get her some water," Raph said and turned toward the sink.

"Raph," Meli called to him.

He stopped but didn't turn. "Yeah?"

"Not your fault," she said, her voice soft. She coughed and he hurried to get her a glass of water. When he moved back to the table, Leo helped her to sit up enough so she could drink. She felt so frail under Leo's hands, and he wished he could hurt whoever had made the explosion. When she'd finished drinking, he eased her back down and smiled at her, hoping he looked reassuring. "It's okay," she whispered. "I'm going to be fine."

But she didn't look fine, and Leo caught Raph's eye for a second. Raph didn't believe her, either. And he'd been there – he knew what had gone down, how she'd looked when he'd found her. "Just rest," Leo said, his voice soft. He touched her cheek with a gentle hand, and hoped Donnie was getting good results. If she was bleeding inside, they'd have to get her to a hospital as quickly as possible.

"Donnie, got anything?" Raph asked two minutes later. His voice was tough, terse – an older brother's voice.

"Just about." Donnie was fussing with something, and Raph frowned. "Okay." Donnie huffed out a deep breath. He turned and walked over to them, and Leo saw a glint of relief in his eyes. "There's no internal damage. When that piece of brick landed on her, it must've fallen more across her legs than her midsection." He touched Meli's hand. "You're plenty bruised up and hurt, but nothing is too serious. I can fix the damage." He looked at Leo, and added, "She's going to be okay."

Leo let out his breath in a soft whoosh and nodded. "Thanks, Donatello."

"No problem. But she needs to rest now, and Raph, Mikey, and April need to get checked out," Donnie said.

"I'm fine," Raph and April said at the same time, and everyone, including Meli, chuckled. But she paled quickly, and Donnie frowned.

"All right, everyone but Meli out, then. I'm going to give her some medication for the pain and check her over completely again, and then she needs to sleep," he said. When Leo made to speak, Donnie shook his head. "No, Leonardo. She's going to be okay. I promise. Now go." He pointed at the door. "Raph, you and April too."

Raph growled something under his breath but did as asked, and Leo kissed Meli's forehead before following his older sister and younger brother out. He made sure the lab door was shut and headed to the kitchen, where the others had gone. Mikey and Emma were sitting at the table, each nursing a glass of dark liquid, and Splinter sat at the end of the table. He looked up as they all entered.

"She is all right?" he asked, his voice soft with concern.

"Donnie says she will be," Leo said, nodding. He leaned back against the counter. He was still edgy, and still wanted to know exactly what had gone down.

"Donnie's usually right," April said, looking at him.

"I know," Leo snapped. He sighed when he saw her recoil. "I'm sorry, April." He rubbed a hand across his forehead. "I've never seen her in so much pain." He looked at Raph. "You said there was an explosion. Where? Why were you guys so close to it?"

Raph folded his arms across his plastron. "Donnie was checking out a small portal he saw. We were across the street from the building that went up. Meli kept movin' closer to it, and then she turned toward us and said to get down." He swept a hand over his eyes. "I'm sorry, Leo. I shoulda kept her closer to me."

"Why didn't you?" The words were out before Leo could think about them, and he saw the others glare at him.

"It's not his fault," April said, shaking her head. "She was only ten feet away or so. None of us could've known that building was going to go up." Her voice was tinged with anger, and Leo held up his hands.

"I know. I'm sorry. I just wish I'd been there."

"Wouldn't have mattered," Mikey muttered. He threw his eldest brother a look. "It flattened all of us, dude. She was just the closest."

"And if I'd been there, she wouldn't have been," Leo said.

It was silent for a few heartbeats, and then Emma said, "True or not, Leo, Raph kept her as safe as he could. You know he wouldn't have let her get injured if he'd been able to help it. It was just something that happened." She spoke in a soft but determined voice, and Leo saw Raph shoot her a grateful look. He smiled in spite of himself and the situation.

"Nice to have someone backing you up unconditionally, isn't it?" he asked Raph.

Raph nodded, his eyes only for Emma. "Yeah, sure is."

"So maybe instead of standing around and laying blame, we should be, I don't know, trying to figure out why the building went up? Who did it?" April said. "Because it's a problem we can't ignore."

"We've got enough going on with the phantoms, don't you think?" Leo asked. "The police and fire departments are equipped to handle looking for an arsonist."

"But one that blows up buildings?" April shook her head. "You know we can't turn a blind eye to this, especially after we got caught in the aftermath."

Leo had to concede she was right. "I know, April, but the phantoms are murdering people. And I know the fires are hurting people too. Obviously." His voice grew dark on the last word. "But we need to concentrate on one thing at a time."

They were quiet then, for several moments, and Leo wondered if his opinion on the situation was as valued as Raph's would be. He hoped so, but knew his actions of the last few months since being home had made it difficult for his family to trust him and his decisions. The fury over what had happened to Meli was still there, bubbling just below the surface, but for right now, he was able to rein it in. "Well? Anyone agree or disagree?" he finally asked, tired of the awkward silence.

"Both things are hurting people," Mikey said, looking over his shoulder at Leo.

"I know," he said.

"And we don't know how to stop the portals from opening that the phantoms are using," Mikey told him. "But maybe we could catch the arsonist."

"Mike's right. That might be the better thing to do right now," Raph agreed. When Leo shot him a look, Raph added, "I know, Leo. The phantoms are bad news. But we almost got killed tonight by whoever's lighting those buildings up." His tone was friendly, but just. Leo knew if he pushed, his younger brother would argue back, and that wasn't best right now.

"Okay. So we go after the arsonist," Leo said, nodding. Donnie came into the kitchen, and Leo was instantly alert, his heartrate kicking up a notch. "She okay?"

"She's asleep, actually." Donnie sounded exhausted. "The rest of you okay? Do you need anything?"

"Sleep, probably," Raph said. "Don, you're dead on your feet. Go get some rest."

Donnie nodded and headed toward the fridge. Leo stepped out of his way, and ducked out of the room. He had to see Meli for himself. She was sleeping, as Donnie had said, and he tucked the heavy quilt more firmly around her. The fury rose as he took in the bruises on her delicate face. _I should've been there. I would've kept her safe. _No more would he stay behind – it was still his team, and Raph would have to be made to listen. Meli twitched in her sleep, and he put his hand on her shoulder, giving it a light squeeze.

"Shh, love, I'm here," he whispered, hoping to soothe away her nightmare. He recognized the signs, and whispered again to her. She needed rest if her body was to make a full recovery. But the twitching increased, and she gasped suddenly, flinging herself upright. Leo immediately wrapped his arms tight around her. "Shh, Meli, I'm right here," he said. "You're safe."

"Leo," she gasped and pushed against him, as if trying to bury herself into his plastron. She was shaking hard, and he kissed the top of her head, rubbing her back with one massive hand. "Oh, Leo."

"It's okay, love. It's okay," he murmured to her. He let go of her so he could get up on the table, and then he eased her into his lap, holding her close to his chest.

"No, it's not, it's not okay." She pushed back from him a little, and the fright in her eyes sent uneasy ripples through him. "I saw something in that building, right before it went up," she whispered. A shudder went through her, and he held her tighter. "It looked like a man made out of smoke," she said, and pressed closer to him. "He looked right at me, and his eyes were orange, like flame."

He could hear the terror in her voice, and realized she was more frightened of this than she was of the phantoms, and that said something. A lot of something, actually. "It could've been a trick of the light, sweetheart, or maybe—"

She cut him off with a violent shake of her head. "No, Leo. It was a mutant, or something like that. He was so scary, and when I realized what he was doing, I tried to run away, tried to warn the others." Her voice broke and she choked back a sob. "I've never been that scared. I saw Raph coming for me, but he just wasn't close enough." Shudders ran deep through her body, and Leo rocked her gently, holding her as tight as he dared.

"We'll find whatever it was, Meli. I promise. We're going to concentrate on finding the arsonist instead of the phantoms for now," he told her.

"You all agreed on that?"

"All of us," he confirmed. _It must've been something that came here through a portal. Great. _This news wasn't going to be greeted with much enthusiasm by the others – it meant a lot more work for them.

"Donnie saw a portal, a small one, right before the building blew," Meli said. "We thought it was from the phantoms, but whatever that other thing was, it must've used it too, or instead of the phantoms." The quiver in her soft voice indicated she didn't like that idea.

"Hey, it's okay," he said, giving her a squeeze. "You're safe."

"For now," she said, nodding her soft head against his plastron. "Leo, why is this all happening now? Is it really because we used that portal of Shredder's to get home from the island?"

"I don't know. Donnie's not sure, either, but I guess that's the only explanation we have," he told her. "You know I'll do whatever I have to in order to keep you safe, to keep everyone safe." His voice was quietly fierce. "I love you, and I'm going to protect you."

"I know, Leo. I love you too," she whispered. "But what if this, this _thing_, isn't that easy to find? Or to get rid of?" The fear in her voice rattled him, and he frowned.

"We will find it, and get rid of it," he told her. She shivered, and he kissed the top of her head again. "You need to rest, love. We'll figure all this out later." He started to let go of her, and she clung to him, wrapping one arm around his neck. "Meli, it's okay," he said, confused by her clinginess. His girl was tougher than this.

"Stay with me," she whispered, and the fear in her voice stayed any other reaction he could have other than saying yes to her. But he didn't understand her panic, her terror. They'd been through some scary adventures together, not the least of which was her almost dying twice. So why did this particular threat frighten her so much? He wanted to ask, but she was already drifting off in his arms, her dark lashes resting against her pale cheeks, and he wasn't about to disturb her slumber. She needed rest, and lots of it.

Raph wandered in about twenty minutes later, stopping when he saw Meli resting comfortably in his older brother's strong arms. Leo nodded to him, and Raph moved closer, eyes never leaving Meli. "She okay?" he whispered.

"No," Leo whispered back, shaking his head. "I'll tell you later."

"Okay." Raph touched Meli's head, his huge hand as gentle as possible, and turned to go. But he stopped, and whispered over his shoulder, "I'm sorry, Leo."

"Not your fault." The words were immediate, and heartfelt.

Raph slowly turned to face him, uncertainty in his eyes. "Wasn't expectin' that response."

Leo frowned at him. "I'm furious, Raphael. Don't think I'm not. She got hurt out there, on _your_ watch. But," and his tone and expression softened, "I know how much you love her, too. And I also know if you'd been able to take the hit, you would've. I'm still angry, and that won't go away for a while. But I know you're sorry it happened, and did the best you could, given the circumstances." Meli stirred a little in his arms, and he gave a nod toward the door.

Raph sighed and turned away, and closed the door softly behind him. Leo cuddled Meli closer, and vowed that no matter what, the thing setting explosions off and the phantoms were going down, by their hands. He was going to make sure of it.


	7. Depth

I don't own the Turtles or their associated friends and family. Please don't borrow Emma or Meli, though...

Hope everyone had a wonderful Christmas and New Year. I'm hoping to get this updated every week until it's finished. Reviews are definitely welcomed, unless there's a flame hidden in them - in that case, I'll pass. Thank you to everyone reading the series, and to have left reviews and sent me messages about the stories. I appreciate all of you.

BREATHE

CHAPTER SEVEN: DEPTH

Raph sunk down onto his bed, tired and disheartened by the night's activities. He rubbed hand over his eyes and wrapped his left arm around Emma, hauling her in close to his side. She seemed to sense he needed quiet, and didn't speak, just cuddled as close to him as she could. _That sucked tonight._ He kept seeing Meli and the others in his mind, being thrown by the blast. _Why did I let her wander over there like that? Why didn't I keep her next to me? _ Leo hadn't told him what was wrong yet, and he wondered if Meli had seen something inside the building, something that had drawn her closer. _Shoulda been there, though. If Leo decides to come at me for it, I won't fight back. I'll deserve that much._ The guilt washed over him anew, and he remembered when he'd been teaching her hand-to-hand, and had gone into ninja mode on her, knocking her down and hurting her. He sighed, the sound heavy rolling from deep in his chest.

"Hey," Emma finally said, touching his face. She pushed herself up on one elbow so she could lean over him. "It wasn't your fault, Raphael. You protected her, and the rest of them, the best you could." Her voice, though quiet, was shot through with fierceness, and he tried to smile. He appreciated her words.

"Coulda done better, Em," he said. "_Shoulda _done better."

"Okay, so why didn't you, then?" She was taking a different tact with him, and he frowned, not sure he liked it. She tapped his chest. "Well?"

"Aw, c'mon," he complained. "Just let me wallow, okay?"

"No." She rested both hands flat against his plastron, and leaned down to press her mouth to his. He brought a hand up to tuck into the honey gold of her hair, wrapping his hand in it, loving the softness. Her mouth was gentle and pliant, and he loved how deeply he could go with her, knowing the exact second he needed to back off and let her breathe. They parted, and she kissed his cheek. "I'm not going to let you beat yourself up over what happened. You can't be expected to protect them from every single danger out there, Raph. And you know damn well Meli would never blame you for what happened."

He sighed and closed his eyes. "I know she wouldn't. But Leo does blame me for it. Said as much himself. And he's right." When she started to talk, he opened his eyes and shook his head. "No, Emma, he's got the right. If it'd been you, and him out there supposed to be watching you, I'd be blamin' him," he told her. "That's just the way it is."

"It doesn't have to be." She pushed herself off him and sat up, running a hand through her hair.

"Hey, don't be like that," he said, reaching for her.

She turned to look at him, and he paused, startled by the ferocity in her gaze. "Em?"

"Why do you torture yourselves like that?" she asked, and her voice was quiet, concerned. "I know I wasn't there, but I also know you love your family, and Meli in particular it seems, and I know you would've done everything possible to insure her safety. So why do you beat yourself up over it? Certainly Leo hasn't always been there to protect her, or the rest of you. Right?"

"You don't understand." He shrugged his massive shoulders.

"So make me." Her jaw tightened and her green eyes were unyielding.

He sat up and turned to fully face her. He took one of her hands, so small within his much-larger and stronger one, and said, "Okay, it's like this. We're bigger and stronger than humans. We care about keeping people and New York City safe, especially those who find their ways into our family." He gave her hand a squeeze. "And when something like this happens, it's hard to take, for him and me both. Donnie and Mikey too, but Leo and I are the oldest. We're the ones in charge." He tipped her chin up with his free hand. "We're the ones the responsibility rests on the most." His eyes begged her to see things from his perspective, and she leaned forward and kissed his jaw.

"Okay, I get it. But it still irks me that he's angry with you. He knows you take good care of them when he's not there," she said.

And there, right there, was one of the reasons he was so enamored with her. She went to bat for him no matter what he'd done, no matter how he'd messed things up. He smiled and kissed her forehead. "He does know that. But try to see it from his perspective: his girlfriend got hurt on _my_ watch. Like I said, if it'd been you, I'd be hot, too."

"Okay," she finally said, exhaling. "But I don't want you to wallow in this. Meli is going to be okay. Donnie said so himself. And even though I haven't been around your family long, I feel like I know them quite well." She hugged him. "You need some sleep, handsome." She got under the covers and patted the bed beside her, and he laid back down next to her, once again snugging her in tight to his plastron.

"I don't deserve ya," he told her.

"You deserve me," she told him, and squeezed the hand he had against her stomach. "You deserve a lot more than you think you do."

He thought that over as she drifted off to sleep, and wondered if she was right. This life wasn't easy, the one he and his family had been born into, but he'd never had a reason to complain, or long for something else. Once April had come into their lives, they'd had the female companionship they'd been longing for, and even when she and Donnie had started growing closer, it hadn't bothered him. Admittedly, when Meli had joined their family, he'd felt a tinge of jealousy, but nothing more than that. He was happy to have two sisters instead of one, and especially since he and Meli were so close. _And now I have Emma, and I know there's nothin' else I need. _He knew Leo felt the same way about Meli, and that was why he was furious over her getting hurt. _But I won't let it happen again. I'm going to keep them all safe while we figure this stuff out._ He began to drift into sleep, and let it come. He needed his rest if he was going to capture the arsonist.

The next morning when he awoke, Emma was gone, and a vague sense of panic stole over him. He pushed it away. She was an early riser, and was probably up working on her next novel. He got up and stretched, and put his mask on before heading out. Mikey was watching cartoons in the pit, and April was just heading into the kitchen. Raph yawned and followed the red head.

"Seen Emma this morning?" he asked, leaning against the doorway.

"Uh, yeah. She's talking to Leo," April told him. "They went for a walk."

"What?" Raph's eyes narrowed. "What're they talkin' about?"

"Oh, relax," she told him, throwing him a grin over her shoulder. "They're just talking about you." The teasing lilt in her voice did nothing to assuage his fear of his girlfriend and older brother hanging out. "Raph, really, it's okay. Are you hungry?"

"I was," he said, coming in and sitting down. "Why are they talkin' about me?"

April patted his shoulder. "Because they are, that's why," she told him. "Cereal? Toast?"

"Is Meli doin' okay?" He almost hated for her to answer.

"She is. She's pretty sore, but she's anxious to get out of the lab. Donnie said she can move to the couch later today." She gestured toward the cabinets. "What'll it be?"

"Pops," he said. He got up and got milk out of the fridge, while she grabbed him his favorite cereal. She poured some in a bowl for him and sat down across the table.

"Don't stress, bro. Really, they're just hanging out," she said. "Getting to know one another more. You know, like you and Meli did."

He ate his cereal, knowing she was right. It wasn't a big deal. So why did it feel like it was?

"Hey guys." Emma walked in with Leo right behind her, and Raph let out a gentle breath. "Hi, sweetie." Emma dropped a kiss on the top of his head, and he knew he was blushing. It was still a little weird for him to be so cozy with Emma in front of his family, but she didn't seem to have any problems. She sat down next to him. "Leo and I had a good talk," she said.

"Yeah?" Raph cast a glance at his older brother, who was taking the milk out of the fridge. "What about?"

"Things," Leo told him, and grabbed the box of Corn Pops. He filled a bowl with them and added the milk.

"Like?" Raph wanted to know. Really, really badly.

Leo offered him a smirk. "Nothing big."

Raph sighed and pushed his bowl away. He wasn't feeling too hungry now. Emma gave his arm a squeeze. "We were just talking about what happened last night," she said, her voice low. He turned his head to look at her. "Its fine, Raphael."

Donnie came into the kitchen. "Leo? We need to talk. Now. In the lab." He left before anyone could question him, and Leo left immediately. April looked at Raph, who shrugged.

"Come on," he said and got up. He wanted to know what had all been said about last night, but guessed it wasn't that important. His girlfriend didn't seem upset at all, and neither did Leo. He hurried to the lab and pushed the door open, the girls following him. Mikey was already inside, sitting next to Meli and holding her hand. "What's goin' on?" Raph demanded.

Donnie sighed and rubbed a hand over his face. "I said 'Leo,' didn't I? That doesn't mean all of you." His voice was sharp, and Raph saw April wince a little.

"Yeah, well, Mike's in here, so," Raph shrugged. "What is it?"

Donnie glanced at Leo, who shrugged and nodded. "Okay. No questions until I'm done, all right?" Donnie waited until everyone had nodded, even Mikey. "Meli told Leo and me what she saw at the building last night before it went up. She saw a man who looked like he was made of smoke, with glowing orange eyes. We think he's a mutant of some kind. Now, given that we found the small portal closing just before the explosion, Meli and I think that he used that portal. So, he might be from the same dimension as the phantoms." Donnie gestured to them. "Any other thoughts?"

"A man?" Raph looked at Meli. "That why you got so close?"

She nodded. "I'm sorry, Raph. I know I shouldn't have left your side. But I saw the shadow, and when I got closer, I realized what it was, or at least, what it looked like. He pointed at me, and opened his mouth, and this huge fireball came out." She shuddered, and Leo immediately moved closer to her, taking her right hand in both of his.

"Why didn't you want to bring all of us in on this? Why just Leo?" April asked. The hurt in her tone was blatant.

Donnie gave her a soft smile. "I wasn't trying to hold out on you guys. I just thought I should run it by Leo first, see what he thought, that's all." He nodded toward Mikey. "And Mikey had just come in to check on Meli."

"Yeah, 'cause no one else was with her," Mikey said, giving a nod of his head. "She should have someone in here to pay attention to her."

"Thank you, Mikey," Meli said, giving him a sweet smile.

"You're welcome," he told her, grinning.

"Okay, okay." Leo rubbed his forehead. "So we think the mysterious smoke man might've used the small portal. So he's either from the same dimension or another dimension that uses small portals."

"He was really big, though," Meli said. "Tall, like six-three or so. Could he have fit through the small portal?"

"Good question." Donnie sighed. "I think we need to go after him and see what else we can determine."

"We're goin' out tonight," Raph said, looking to Leo to see if he agreed. Leo gave a quick nod.

"Yes, we are. And we're not coming home until we've gotten some solid leads, on either this shadow man or the phantoms." He gave Meli's hand a gentle squeeze. "You, however, are staying right here tonight. You can keep Emma company." His tone was firm, but his voice was soft.

She nodded. "I know. I wouldn't be any good to you guys tonight."

"_You_ feelin' up to going tonight?" Raph asked, directing the question to Leo.

"I'm good," Leo said, nodding. He gave Meli's hand another squeeze and let go. "We should talk strategy for tonight. I don't want us going out blind."

"So talk," Raph said, crossing his arms over his plastron. If his older brother wanted to run things his way right now, he'd let him. Tonight on the roofs might be a different story, though, depending on what Leo came up with.

"Donnie, try to find out if there's a pattern to the buildings being hit, see if the smoke man is staying within a certain area," Leo said. He leaned back against the table. "We should also see if there's a pattern to the phantoms' attacks, too."

"Not bad," Raph said. Leo shot him a look. "What? I agree with all that."

"Can you not sound like you're so surprised?" Leo asked. "I used to run this team." There was a bite in his words that made Raph's blood boil, but Emma put her hand on his shoulder, and he forced the anger back.

"Focus, people," April said, a ring of command in her voice. "Okay, Leo. I'll help Donnie with the patterns. What else?"

"We start talking to the Dragons," Leo said. "Some of them have been hit by the phantoms, and they might know more than we do about them." When Raph shot him a dubious look, he added, "Doesn't hurt to talk to them, Raph."

"Nah, I guess not. But you know they ain't gonna like us on their territory," Raph told him.

"Doesn't matter. It's for their safety as well as everyone else's." Leo pushed himself upright. "I'm going to go work out. Donnie, let me know when you have something." He turned to face Meli. "You okay for now?" His voice was soft and caressing, as was the hand that gently touched her bruised face.

"I'm fine," she said, nodding.

"I'll stay and hang out with her," Mikey volunteered.

Leo nodded and left the room, and Raph followed, determined to find out just what his older brother had been discussing with Emma. Leo glanced back at him as they went into the dojo. "What, Raph?"

"What were you and Em talking about earlier?" he asked.

Leo shot a grin back at him. "Worried I was talking you down to her?"

"No. She wouldn't believe you anyway," Raph shot back. He walked to the punching bag and gave it a hit. It swung back and he hit it again, harder this time.

"We were discussing my reaction to Meli getting hurt," Leo finally said. He had taken his katana down and was moving through a delicate-looking kata with them.

"Really." That didn't surprise Raph too much; Emma had been pretty adamant that Leo was being unfair the night before. "And?"

"And what?" Leo was concentrating, and not paying much attention to his younger brother. Raph stopped and watched him. Though not a fan of having to do katas, he was generally impressed with Leo's skill as he moved through the routine, his blades singing through the air.

"She chew you out?"

Leo snorted. "No. Why, you hoping she would?" He spun and twirled his swords in front of him.

Raph scowled. "Yeah, maybe." _Why didn't she lay into him? She laid into me about it._

Leo stopped moving and turned to face him. "Look, she told me she didn't think it was fair that I got mad at you for Meli getting hurt. I told her Meli was under your care. She got hurt. So yeah, I'm mad." More than mad – Raph heard it in his voice. "But I told her I know you were doing the best you could, and that things happen beyond our control sometimes. Still doesn't mean I won't react that way. Meli's my girl."

Raph nodded. "I told Em that same thing last night. I told her if she'd gotten hurt on _your_ watch, I'd be mad too."

"She's a nice girl," Leo told him. "And she doesn't pull her punches."

Raph smirked. "She ask you about the island, or any of that stuff?"

"She told me I need counseling for the rage issue." Leo rolled his eyes. "Like I can drop into some psychologist's office in Manhattan. Right."

Raph's eyes darkened a little. "You were nice to her, right?"

Leo sighed and shoved his katana into their scabbards on his back. "Yes, I was nice to her. Contrary to popular belief around here, I'm a nice guy." His tone was biting.

"If it's popular, it's because you brought it on yourself," Raph told him, and turned for the door. He had better things to do than stand here and talk trash with Leo.

"What the hell does that mean?"

Raph turned to face him. Leo had moved closer to him, and there was a grim, determined look on his face. "You ain't exactly been yourself, Leo, and you know it," Raph told him. "You haven't hurt any of us in a while, but you haven't been the same."

"I told you I wasn't the same when we first came back," Leo growled. "I was honest with how things were. And I've been trying. I've been better. You can't deny that." His tone suggested Raph _should_ try to deny it.

Raph huffed out a breath and turned away. "Yeah, yeah, it's all good. Whatever." He was almost to the door when Leo grabbed him by the shoulder, and spinning him around, hit him hard on the jaw and knocked him down. Raph shook his head and stared up at Leo. Leo's eyes were glowing hot, and Raph took a deep breath. They hadn't gotten into a fight since Leo had run his katana through Donnie during a "rage-out," as Mikey called Leo's fits of rage, but he'd felt one was coming the last few days. He slowly got to his feet, knowing they needed to get this out of the way. "Come on," he taunted, waving Leo forward.

Leo snarled something beneath his breath, and feinted left. Raph didn't fall for it, and was ready when Leo turned right. He blocked Leo's fist and got in a hit of his own, getting Leo hard in the chest and driving him backward. They circled each other, neither backing down. Raph wasn't sure they could back down from this fight. It felt like they needed to clear the air, like nothing could move forward between them until they did this.

"Hey, Leo, Donnie found – what are you two doing?" April's voice rose into a near-shout, and she pushed her way between them, one hand on Raph's plastron, the other on Leo's. "Really? Right now? Like we don't have enough going on?" The anger in her voice snapped the tension between the brothers, and Raph took a step back, huffing out an exasperated breath.

"Look, this is somethin' we need to work out," he told her, trying not to sound upset. But he was, and he could see Leo was, too. They both needed to work out their aggravations with one another, and fighting was the best way, the only way, they knew how.

April let out a long-suffering sigh. "Ugh. Shut it, Raph." She turned to Leo. "Donnie found some patterns," she told him, "and you're going to be surprised at what he found. Come on. You two can 'work out' your problems later." She grabbed Leo's arm and hauled him from the room, and he went along willingly, casting a dark glance back at Raph. Raph growled under his breath and followed, at a same distance. When they got to the lab, Donnie turned to face them, and the spark of excitement glowing in his big brown eyes gave Raph pause. Donnie hadn't looked this excited about anything in a while.

"Let's have it," Leo said. He walked over and hopped up on the lab table, where Meli was sitting, talking quietly to Mikey. Raph frowned a little at the surge of jealousy he felt, and pushed it off. He knew he was still Meli's go-to brother for help or comfort, or anything else she needed.

"Hey," he whispered to Emma, who had followed them all in.

"Everything okay with you guys?" she whispered back, nodding toward Leo. "I wanted to follow you, but thought I'd better not." There was hesitation and uncertainty in her pretty eyes, and he wrapped her up in a one-armed hug, holding her close to him.

"Not okay, but we got more important stuff to work out," he told her quietly. She gave him a dubious look, but stayed quiet as Donnie began to talk.

"I was cross-checking the patterns between the phantoms and the fires," Donnie said, holding up a piece of graph paper, "and found some very interesting parallels." He passed the paper to Leo, who frowned in thought as he read over it. "You'll notice that the phantoms' attacks are spread in a ring around where the fires and explosions have been occurring."

"Yeah, I see it," Leo said, and showed it to Meli and Mikey. After they'd had a chance to check it over, he handed it over to Raph and Emma. "Go on," he told Donnie.

"Well," Donnie continued, and tapped on one of his keyboards, "I believe that the phantoms are actually causing the fires. I think there's a more of a purpose behind them stealing peoples' breaths than simply needing the oxygen to survive, or doing it out of sport." He pulled up a graphic chart and tapped the monitor. "I think the phantoms take in as much oxygen as they need, and then turn into those smoke creatures."

"But why? What's the purpose behind that?" Leo asked.

"That, I don't know yet," Donnie confessed, shaking his head. "But I'll figure it out. And the phantoms seem to be staying in one central area, at least right now."

Emma had been studying the notes Donnie had made, and she said, "I don't know if this is significant or not, but all the attacks are centered around this building." Her voice was shaky, and Raph frowned, giving her a squeeze. She looked up at him. "_My_ apartment building."

Raph took the paper from her and studied it more closely, and lifted his gaze to Leo's. "She's right. Her building is about smack in the middle."

"There must be something about that building that's drawing them," Meli said.

"Like Ghostbusters," Mikey chimed in, grinning when they all threw annoyed looks his way. "What, I'm right, aren't I? All the spooky activity was centered around Dana's building."

"My girlfriend doesn't live in the corner penthouse of spook central, Mike," Raph retorted. A line of ice ran through his hard voice. "So what are we gonna do about this?"

"We're going to watch this line," Leo said, pointing toward Donnie's computer screen. "If the phantoms _are_ being drawn by Emma's building, for whatever reason, then that's where we need to patrol."

"Yeah, I'm down with that," Raph said, nodding. Emma shivered against him, and he tilted her chin so he could see her eyes. "Don't worry. I'm not gonna let anything hurt you." The fierceness in his voice matched the fierce fire in his emerald eyes.

She nodded. "I know. I just don't want you guys to get hurt."

"We won't," Leo told her, his tone grim. "Thanks, Donnie. This should help us out a lot. I wish I'd had you do this before now."

Donnie shrugged. "I should've thought of it before, too. But at least we've got the pattern now, as long as those things don't change it." Determination flared through his voice.

"None of us thought there'd be a pattern," Meli said softly. "You guys need to be careful out there. If the phantoms suspect you've nailed them to a specific range of attacks, they might change it."

"We'll be careful," Leo reassured her. He turned to talk to her, and Mikey wandered out of the lab, absent-mindedly punching Raph in the arm as he walked by.

Raph growled something at him and looked down at Emma. She looked shaken, and he let go of her, taking her hand instead and leading her out of the lab. They walked to the turnstiles and he lifted her effortlessly over them, bounding over after he set her down. They were quiet as he took her hand and led her down the tunnel to the left, away from the lair. Once he'd determined they were far enough away that Mikey wouldn't bother them, he turned to face her. She looked calm, but he knew her well-enough to know it was just a façade. "Everything's gonna be okay," he told her, his voice quietly determined. "We'll figure out how to get rid of the phantoms."

She leaned against him, wrapping her arms around him and snuggling in against his chest, and he kissed the top of her head, wishing he could comfort her more. He wasn't good with words the way Leo was, or even Donnie. He held her close, hoping that that at least was reassuring. "When will I be able to go home again?" she asked, her voice soft.

"Soon as we get this all straightened out," he told her. She pulled back a little from him so she could see his face, and he saw a hint of stubbornness in her eyes. "Em, I want to keep ya safe. You can't go home until I can do that."

"I know you want to keep me safe, Raphael, but I have a job. I can't hide down here until who knows when," she said. When his eyes narrowed with temper, she gave him a squeeze. "I understand why you want me here. But you have to understand that I have responsibilities, too. I mean, Meli goes back to the Trove to work, right?" She was begging him to understand, and he knew she had a valid point, but he couldn't let her go home. Not with her apartment building central to the problem.

"Yeah, she does go home," he agreed. "But not when we think she's in danger. And you're in danger, Emma. Maybe more than you realize."

"The phantoms can't possibly be after me specifically, Raph. That doesn't make any sense. They're just killing whoever they can get to," she argued. "I need to go see my editor about this next book, and I'm supposed to do a book signing next weekend."

He could feel the anger building in her, saw it starting to arc in her eyes. And he wanted her to be able to do those things, to live a normal life. _Normal. Ha. Like she can really do that when she has a ninja turtle boyfriend,_ he thought, scowling. She'd chosen him, like Meli and April had chosen Leo and Donnie, but what if she was starting to regret it? What if now, after seeing how he lived, and the dangers that came along with that lifestyle, she wanted out? His heart plummeted with the thought, and he dropped his arms from around her.

"Raph? Hey, what is it?" she asked, looking up at him, sweet concern in her voice. "I'm not mad at you. I'm just frustrated by this situation."

"Yeah?" he said.

"Yes." She hugged him hard. "I like you, an awful lot, and I know you're doing what's best for me. I just hope this comes to a conclusion soon."

"And if it doesn't?" He knew the harsh tone was unfair, saw the hurt dance across her eyes, and hated himself for putting it there.

"We'll cross that bridge when we come to it," she told him. "We're okay, aren't we?"

He looked down at her, at this woman he knew he was falling in love with, and wasn't sure what to say. He didn't want to accuse her of not feeling the same, or at least, not having the same depth of feelings, but didn't want to say they were okay if they weren't. When he hesitated, she bit her lip and whispered, "I'm falling in love with you, Raphael, and I need to know if you feel the same way, because if you don't, then I need to get out of here. Stat."

His chest tightened so hard he didn't think he could breathe, and he managed to whisper, "What?"

"I love you," Emma said. "But if you don't feel the same—"

He cut her off by pressing his mouth to hers, his arms coming around her, one holding her tightly to him, the other coming up so he could rest his hand on the back of her head. She sighed into his mouth, just a tiny little sound, and it drove him crazy. He kissed her deeper. There was no resistance, no attempt to stop him, and he kissed her until they both needed to breathe. He put his forehead to hers, looking into those lovely light green eyes he loved, and whispered, "Love ya, too, Em."

She gave a little squeal of joy and laughed, and he laughed along with her. "I thought maybe you didn't feel the same way, or at least as much as I did," she told him.

"I didn't think you felt that way about me," he said, shaking his head. "I love you more than anyone."

She smiled and pulled his head back down to hers, and as they kissed again, he promised himself that he would always be there to take care of her, to protect her, to love her. Finally, he knew the depths of the love that his brothers showed their own girlfriends, and he knew he would do everything in his power to show Emma how much she meant to him.


	8. Argument

I don't own the Turtles. Really, honestly, I don't.

I would like to thank those who have continued following the stories, and to those who are new fans to the series. And to the person simply in as "guest" - thank you for that very, very nice review. And yes, if you've been reading "Breathe," you've seen that Emma has suggested therapy to Leo, who has so far rejected it. But his way of thinking might change :-)

BREATHE

CHAPTER EIGHT: ARGUMENT

Leo watched Meli surreptitiously from the corner of his right eye, noting how she was staring into space, how she was constantly licking her lips, and how she was wringing her hands together and then smoothing out the blanket resting over her lower body. Something was definitely up, and he figured it was something she didn't want to talk about. Not yet, anyway. He turned his attention back to the show they'd been watching, about four scientists and their girls, but it had lost its earlier appeal. Meli sighed beside him, and he turned his head to look at her.

"Okay, love, what's up?" he asked, keeping his voice low. There was no need to draw unwanted attention to this discussion.

She glanced at him, and he saw a glimpse of something painful in those hazel eyes he loved so much. "It's—"

"Tell me it's nothing and I won't let you out of the lair for a week," he warned. He was only half-kidding.

Her eyes flashed and she shook her head. "I really don't want to talk about it right now," she told him.

"You know it's better to get it off your chest than hang on to it," he said. He reached out and touched her arm. "If something's bothering you, I want to help."

She looked ready to say something, didn't, and finally nodded. "But not here. Let's go for a walk." She got up and headed toward the turnstiles, and he turned the TV off and reached out to snag her arm. "Leo?"

"You're not in any kind of condition to go for a walk," he told her, shaking his head. "We can talk here."

Raph and Emma were out in the tunnels somewhere, and he was pretty sure he didn't want to run into them, even if Meli would be able to go for a walk. Anger still stretched like an invisible cord between him and his younger brother, and if he saw Raph, it might snap. Meli was upset, and he didn't like the solemn look in her eyes, or the morose way about her. Yeah, their family had problems. Big problems right now, but she knew them well-enough by now to know that they'd never met a problem they couldn't solve, or a situation they couldn't win. So why was she acting like this?

He took her hand and gave it a gentle tug, until she sat down again. She was quiet, her hand cold in his, and he glanced at her, wondering just what was going on in that pretty head of hers. "Okay, what is it?" he asked.

She swallowed hard and searched his face for what, he wasn't sure. "It's my dad. He called me a few days ago. He's run into a problem. Well, maybe a couple, but he's not being specific." She took a deep breath and exhaled slowly. "There are some people he's made mad at him, and they've been following him. I guess they think he stole something from beneath their noses, or something like that. Like I said, he's not been real specific."

"Is he in danger right now?" Leo asked, not liking this. He needed her mind clear and focused on what was happening here. "Meli?"

She shook her head, and he saw a glint of tears in her eyes. "I don't know. I think so. I haven't heard from him since yesterday."

Leo reached out and drew her to him, wrapping his arms around her. "Why didn't you tell me this was happening?" he asked, his voice soft.

"I didn't want to worry you, or the others," she said, burrowing deeper into his hold. "And my dad can usually handle himself. He has lots of treasure-hunting friends. But this time, I don't know, it just feels off," she added.

"You can always tell me what's going on," he said, kissing the top of her head. "Have you tried calling him?"

"I did, a while ago. He didn't pick up." She pulled back from him and looked up, and he was startled by the fear in her eyes, and suddenly realized that it probably hadn't been the smoke man who had frightened her so badly the night before – it was the idea that her father was in danger that had her so upset.

"We'll find out what happened," he told her. "I don't know how, but we will. I promise." He tipped her chin up. "It'll be okay," he whispered, and gently kissed her, wishing there was more he could do for her. She sighed when he eased his mouth from hers.

"I know. And I'm sorry I didn't tell you. There's just so much going on right now." She put her cheek against his plastron, and he held her close to him. He knew he'd been preoccupied by what was happening, and hadn't spent a lot of time with her in the last couple of days, not nearly as much as he normally would. Some of her trepidation at telling him was his own fault.

"Where was he at the last time you spoke to him?" he asked.

"On an island, but I'm not sure which one," she said. "I just feel so helpless here. I mean, he doesn't really ever need my help, but when I talked to him, he sounded, I don't know, kind of shaken and desperate. That's not him." Her voice shook a little, and he again tipped her chin up so he could look into her eyes.

"Why don't we have Donnie see if he can find out where your dad is by pinging his call from your phone," he suggested. "Then we'd at least have that information." He spoke in a quiet, firm voice, his hands steady on her shoulders.

"Okay. I hadn't thought about doing that," she told him, and there was a tiny spark of hope in her eyes that he was happy to see.

He hugged her and said, "We'll do everything we can to find and help him."

"I know," she said, nodding. She took a deep breath and exhaled it quietly. "Do you think the phantoms are turning into those smoke man things?"

"It's as good a guess as any," he said, shrugging. "The biggest problem we have is how to stop them and close those portals, so no more can get through." That they _would_ fix the problem wasn't even the issue. They'd been through enough to know that when they put their minds and efforts into something, it got done.

"I wonder why it's all centered around Emma's building?" Meli didn't seem to be looking for an answer – she seemed to be just thinking out loud. Leo gave her a squeeze.

"We'll figure that out, too. There must be something in the building or about it that's drawing them. At least we have a hard line now to work with," he told her. "Hopefully they'll try to open one of their portals and we can shut it down."

Meli's phone rang and he let go of her so she could answer, watching her face closely. "Hello?" She listened for a moment, and turned to face Leo, horror lighting her hazel eyes. "No, no, please, don't do that, Dad. You need help—" She broke off as she listened, and as tears began to glint in her eyes, Leo's heart pounded and he could feel the rage that he'd been trying so hard to shut away seeping into his system. "Dad?" She swore under her breath and set her phone down on the old coffee table. Leo waited for her to talk. "He said he's going underground. He said he has a safe house he can go to, where these guys can't find him. But he wouldn't tell me where it is, and I just know he's getting himself into more trouble." The tears in her eyes started to slide down her cheeks, and he eased her into his arms, holding her close and tight.

"We'll figure out a way to help him, love," he whispered into her ear. "Trust me. We'll get him out of this." Mr. Tompkins hadn't been anything but nice to Leo and his unusual family, and he wanted to protect the older man as much as he could. She nodded her head against his chest, but he could tell from her body language that his words hadn't done anything to ease her tension.

"What happened?"

Raph's voice jolted through Leo, and he raised his eyes to see his younger brother and his girlfriend standing a few feet away. Raph's eyes were glued to Meli, and Leo forced himself to relax. It was only natural that Raph would be worried about Meli. She pulled herself away from the comfort of Leo's arms and turned to face the turtle in red. "It's my dad. He's gotten himself into some trouble overseas, and I'm not sure what to do about it," she said. She sounded much stronger than she had a few moments ago, and Leo was proud of her for being tough, and also concerned that she was able to push down her emotions so quickly. He knew it wasn't healthy to do so – he had first-hand experience with it.

Raph frowned. "Sorry to hear that. Is there anything we can do?"

"No, I don't think so. Not right now, anyway." Meli got off the couch, winced, and murmured a few words beneath her breath.

Leo reached out to steady her. "You should sit and rest," he told her, concerned that she was pushing herself too much. "Donnie said to stay down today."

"I know," she snapped, and immediately sighed. "I'm sorry," she said, glancing at him over her shoulder. She bit her lip, and he could see her fighting to rein in her tears. He got off the couch, scooped her up, and moved toward their room. "Leo, put me down," she said, struggling against him.

"Stop," he said, his voice hard. She sighed and tucked herself into his hold, and he pushed open the bedroom door and set her down, then swung the door shut.

"I'm sorry I snapped at you," she said, and the pain in her voice hit him hard in the chest. He took her hand and led her over to the bed, and indicated she should sit. "I just feel useless sitting here, you know?" She sat and put her chin in her hands, and the misery that surrounded her made Leo sick. How was he going to fix this for her? Could he fix it?

"I know, love, but if your dad has a safe house, then he's probably okay for now, don't you think?" he asked, his voice soft. He sat next to her and rubbed a big hand across her back, feeling the tension in it. "We'll still have Donnie ping his phone call, and see what we can find out," he added.

"Okay." She put her head on his shoulder, and he wrapped an arm around her waist. He wanted nothing more than to make her feel better, but knew all he could really do was sit here and offer whatever comfort he could. "Please be extra-careful tonight, okay? Those creatures are dangerous," she said.

"We will. Like I said, at least we have a very specific area where the attacks are going down. That should help," he said.

"You and Raph okay?"

He stiffened, and she pulled back, her eyes roving over his face. "Leo, whatever it is, you two have to work through it. I know you're not crazy about following his orders, but until you're ready to take the team back—"

"That's the problem. I want the team back, and I don't think he's ready to let go," he told her. His voice was hard. "I know he thinks I'm still too out-of-control, but I can do it," he added. His voice was steely with conviction.

Meli was quiet for a few moments. Leo looked at her, not sure what that silence meant. Did she agree with Raph, that he was too much of a loose cannon to take the team back? They'd been sharing the leadership, but Leo was tired of sharing it. They were _his_ team. Splinter had made him the leader years ago, and leader was what he needed to be right now. "I know you want to take leadership back, sweetie, but maybe this isn't the right time, with everything going on," she finally said, a cautious note in her voice. He frowned at her.

"So you're agreeing with Raph, then."

She touched his plastron gently. "It's not that I'm necessarily agreeing with him, I just think—"

"Call it what it is," he told her, his voice sharp. "You think I'm still too much of a danger to myself and you guys to run the team." He got to his feet and glared down at her. "I know I still have issues, Meli. We _all_ do, after what's happened the past year. But you should back me up on this because you're my girlfriend." He turned away from her and yanked open the door. When she said nothing, he strode through it and headed to the dojo.

He'd performed several kata and was glistening with sweat when he noticed Raph leaning against the wall, watching him. His brother's face was a mask of stone, and Leo huffed out an impatient breath. He didn't have time to deal with Raph, nor did he want to. But he was tired, and as he hung up his katana and turned to face him, Raph started walking over. "Not in the mood," Leo warned him, his tone frosty.

Raph stopped and crossed his arms over his plastron. "No? You more in the mood to snap at your girlfriend instead?" His green eyes sparked with anger.

"Stay out of it, Raphael," Leo said. "She's not your concern."

"Oh really? Because I think she is. She's my sister, and I want to know why you're treating her like this," Raph growled.

Leo exhaled. "Look, we're having an argument. It's not the end of the world. You and Emma must've had some." He started to walk past Raph. "Just drop it."

Raph snarled something beneath his breath and lunged sideways at Leo. Leo was ready. He'd known Raph couldn't just leave things alone – that wasn't his nature. He hit his brother hard in the plastron, driving him backward. Raph recovered and surged forward, right fist swinging. He missed, and Leo used his forward momentum to trip and hit him at the same time. Raph went down hard but was immediately back on his feet, his eyes glittering behind his mask. Leo circled him, cautious. He knew all too well how hard Raph could hit. And he wouldn't be pulling any of his punches, either. But that was all right. Leo could hit hard, too. He saw Raph's right hand drift to his sai, and his stomach tightened. If it came down to weapons, he'd have to get to the wall and grab his katana. The sai stayed in Raph's belt though, and the two brothers continued to circle, feinting at each other every so many seconds.

Finally, Leo tired of it and charged Raph. He was fast, and Raph didn't have time to properly block. Leo hit him with all the anger that he'd been dragging around, all the rage he'd tried so hard to force out of his system. Raph went down hard on his shell, and Leo dropped over him, intending on making Raph regret starting this fight. But the instant before his right fist found Raph's mouth, he stopped. He blew out a hard breath and eased back and up, straightening to his full height. Raph stared up at him, cautious, one hand on his sai. Leo took a few more moments to let the rage go, and offered his younger brother his hand. Raph took it, and Leo hauled him to his feet.

They were quiet for several minutes, both regaining control of their breathing and themselves. Leo recovered first and turned his head toward Raph. "Like I said, it's just an argument, Raphael. We do fight on occasion."

Raph huffed out a deep breath. "I know."

"So?"

Raph looked at him. Hard. "I want you guys to be happy, okay? There hasn't been a lot of that lately. And it makes me mad when she's upset."

"I know it does." Leo stared at the floor. "And I don't like upsetting her. But damn it, Raph, I'm ready to take the team back, and she's siding with you. She thinks I should wait until all of this blows over." He gestured with his right hand. "That hurts."

Raph glanced at him. "You're leading more often now than I am."

"I know." Leo knew he sounded like an ingrate; after all, Raph had been given command of the team by Splinter, and their father hadn't yet said Leo could take it back. "It's hard for me to take commands from you," he said, looking at Raph. "And that sounds stupid, but it is. I'm not used to that yet."

"Yeah, well, no offense, but I was never super-fond of listening to _you_, either," Raph retorted. "And I'm not convinced you're stable enough to lead us. After what you did to those phantoms," he shrugged, "I'm not seein' you as ready to lead yet. I think you actually _enjoyed_ killing those things."

That stung. Leo knew he'd been out-of-control that night, had known it and done nothing about it, because the rage had felt _good_, burning through his body, consuming everything until all that he had was hatred for the creatures murdering _his_ city's population. But he hadn't thought about how his brothers were perceiving him. Did Donnie and Mikey think he'd been having fun, too? That it had been enjoyable? The biggest problem was that it _had_ been enjoyable for him. The sing of his blades as they took the lives of the dangerous little creatures transported him back to the fights he'd won over the last year, fights he'd won simply because he had to in order to survive.

He gave a slow shake of his head and looked at Raph. "You're right. I did enjoy killing them. I liked the feeling of my katana sliding through them, of seeing their blood gushing into the street." His voice was low and cold, and he saw Raph's eyes widen behind his mask. "Truth be told, Raphael, I'm good at killing. I did it so many times over the last year its second nature to me now." He barked out a bitter laugh. "You and Meli are right. I'm not fit to lead anymore. In fact, I'm pretty sure I'm not fit to live here, either. I've tried it. You saw what happened. I'm starting to think going with Karai was the better option."

"You don't believe that," Raph told him. His voice was hot. "You and Meli belong together, Leo. This isn't you talkin'. It's all that rage you've got bottled up inside."

Leo laughed again. "You ever stop to think that's all there's _left_ of me? You weren't there, Raph. You didn't see what I did. You didn't have to do what I did." His voice tasted bitter and odd to him.

"So tell me then," Raph demanded. "Tell me what you went through."

Leo sighed. "It's not that easy. I don't want to talk about it."

"Well, you sure as hell better, since you're thinkin' you might be better off with crazy Karai," Raph said. He gave Leo a hard shove in the right shoulder. "I'm serious."

For some reason, the shove made Leo grin. As if his younger brother could ever force him to do something he didn't want to. Yet he also knew Raph was right. This wasn't him, this bleak and cold killer. It might've been, a year ago, but not now. He had a decision to make, and soon. Either he gave up the rage and its feelings of power and supremacy, or he kept it and turned away from Meli and his family. The sad thing was, he shouldn't even have had to think about the choice. It should've been natural. The fact that it wasn't meant he needed help. "Give me some time, Raph. I need to do some thinking," he finally said.

"Yeah, fine. But you're not taking the team back, and you better make things right with Meli," Raph growled. "And when we get rid of the phantoms and the smoke guys, you're going to tell me what happened over the last year. All of it." His eyes met Leo's with determination, and Leo nodded.

"That's fair," he said.

The door to the dojo opened, and Meli hesitantly stuck her head in. The sight of her warmed Leo's heart, and he said, "Hey, love. Come here for a minute."

She came then, quickly, and he hugged her hard, holding her close and kissing the top of her head. She snuggled into him, and he knew that even though letting go of the rage and the anger and all the other bad things he'd lived with over the last year would be hard, she was worth the effort. Still, it wasn't a decision he knew he could make and expect himself not to have problems, especially when she or his family was in trouble. "I'm sorry," he whispered to her.

She eased back from him a little. "Me too. I just want what's best for you, for all of us," she said quietly. She glanced at Raph, who was pretending not to notice what was going on. "Raph, Emma wanted you. She's upset about something."

Raph's eyes narrowed and he nodded. "Thanks, Mel." He gave her shoulder a gentle squeeze as he left, and nodded at Leo.

"You guys okay now?" Meli asked, watching her brother depart.

"We're getting there," Leo told her. "I'm letting Raph keep the team for now. I think that's best, and he's not real inclined to give it back just yet anyway," he said.

She nodded and touched his mouth where the scar puckered it. "I know this is hard for you, sweetie, and it's probably not going to get a lot easier. But I'm here for you. We all are." Her voice was soft and he smiled, dipping his mouth to hers for a quick kiss.

"Thanks. I do have a lot to sort out," he admitted. "It just feels like I keep going in circles, like I can't escape the rage and how it makes me feel." He hated admitting that to her, because in his eyes, it made him seem weak. And he was her boyfriend, her protector, and she needed him to be strong and capable.

She smiled up at him and gave him a squeeze around his waist. "It will get better, Leo. I know it will. And I know you don't want to tell me what all happened, but I'm here to listen if you need to vent or talk." Her hazel eyes shone with her adoration and love for him, and his heart constricted, almost painfully. How could he ever think, ever entertain, the idea of leaving her again? Maybe he should've let Raph get a few more hits in.

"I love you," he said softly. He tipped her chin up a little, and she stretched to kiss him. Again, he swore to himself, he would do whatever necessary to get better so he could _be_ better for her, for his family, and for himself.


End file.
